The doom of the world is spelled out in quilted sheets.
The always-unbiased Guardian (dot-co-dot-uk) has given us a very important public safety announcement. Americans are destroying all life on earth one ply at a time. How typically American. The pigs. This is worse than driving Hummers, sez Allen Hershkowitz, a senior scientist at the Natural Resources Defence Council. Wow, that’s pretty damning evidence.
I really do think it is overwhelmingly an American phenomenom,” said Hershkowitz. “People just don’t understand that softness equals ecological destruction.
Note: I and my tender bum are consumed with black wracking soul-quenching guilt. Thought I’d throw a British term in there to stay in character – as long as we’re bashing the Yanks we ought to talk like us even if we are them. Ok, I’m confused, but still guilty as hell.
Welp, there is help on the way.
click to embiggen
So, how’s that for your great big steaming helping of Friday Horsesh*t?
I wish I’d done that graphic… well done. Actually the way that article espouses the “holier-than-thou because our-shite-don’t-stinketh” recycling and smug ecological wisdom, coupled with a combination of acidic disdain and irritability… it makes me wonder if Europe and the UK haven’t been using Badger’s Arse™ for some time.
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Glenn Beck did a great piece on the TV tonight. Here’s the link but I want to paste part of the op-ed here for emphasis.
… let me go through some recent stories that didn’t make headlines, but I’m going to make just one teeny-weeny little change. You tell me if the media would’ve reacted the same way or if The New York Times would’ve been cranking out special editions to cover this stuff:
“Today, President George W. Bush nominated another tax cheat for his Cabinet”
“In an unprecedented move, President Bush has asked to move control over the census to the White House; it will now be run by Karl Rove“
“President Bush quietly OKs a massive troop surge in Afghanistan, sending 17,000 additional troops; refusing to hold a news conference or answer any questions”
“President Bush has said he will leave up to 50,000 troops in Iraq, after months of promising drawdown.“
“The night after George W. Bush proclaimed we all have to make economic sacrifices, he introduced an unprecedented $3.6 trillion budget.“
“Bush raises taxes by a trillion dollars to cover out-of-control spending.”
“Bush takes first big step toward bank nationalization, buying a 36 percent share in Citigroup.“
Now, substitute “Obama” for “Bush” and those stories go from the front page to page E-12.
- Glenn Beck
There would have been a media circus. Calls for crucifixion would have gone up. Congress would have demanded answers and subpoenaed Bush, Rove, Cheney, and Bush’s dog. Liberals everywhere would have squirted poop in their hemp underwear.
Nary a whistle now. You can’t prosecute a God.
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Thanks to Conservative Belle posting this over at Double-Plus Undead I think we now have a spiffy new acronym: HTOVWOFY?
Since I can’t link the blog entry itself, I’ll paste it because it reads better than I could convey it:
Great Name for a Blog
I was over at Mark Finkelstein’s new blog, checking out his latest posts and I saw this blog from one of his commenters.
Ha! I wish I had thought of that one. So how long before we have the acronym – HTOVWOFY? This should now become a regular part of our vocabulary on this moron blog. All in favor?
I’m in favor of it being regular vocabulary on all the MoronBlogs. Thanks again, Conservative Belle.
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ECM in that same post over at DPUD linked to this important tool. How to tell what a nuclear blast radius looks like at your location.
Egads. Almost but not quite as disturbing as the quest in Fallout 3 where you can (if you are the harbinger of ultimate evil) nuke a town. I did the quest just to see how it played out and I was so creeped out I loaded an old save and vowed to never do that again. Brrrr.
The mapplet… enter where, enter the yield of the weapon, and hit “nuke it”. It will tell you just how unfortunate certain things would be. You really want to creep yourself out, select “asteroid strike”.
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Neato. A new fish in Indonesia.
If I’m going to slam the Guardian in my post I ought to give them kudos for this article which has far more information about this than I care to pass on. Go read up on it.
A funky, psychedelic fish that bounces on the ocean floor like a rubber ball has been classified as a new species, a scientific journal reported. (Copeia, the journal of the American Society of Ichthyologists and Herpetologists)
Of course, it is massively sad that it was published in an American society magazine. Pigs. How typically American to steal news of a fish.
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I dated this creature once. – thanks Sean M.
