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Archive for April, 2012

Destructive Duo.

Update:  A good friend who I will not name but it’s Aggie has suggested a new name for Girlhead.  I am so enamored of it that I’m throwing it out there and y’all can vote but I’m 90% of the way to adopting it.  It just sounds purty.

Lemurita

Let’s take a vote – regarding Girlhead’s stage name on this blog – should we:

A) Keep it the way it is – “Girlhead”?

or

B) Change it to “Lemur Girl”?

or

C) Lemurita

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It’s no secret that I really resonate with my daughter Lemurita, and nine is such a fun age in my opinion.  The other night we took apart the broken kitchen clock, down to the component gears, and talked about gear ratios, electromagnetics (the teensy motor), and put it back carefully to restore it to working order.  So she got to see what I’ve done all my life, which is take things apart – she still doesn’t have a clue how many things I’ve never been able to properly reassemble but I told her that even those are things you learn from.

Why fight to save an old kitchen clock?  Because the replacement Cruel Wife had is hideous.  She thinks it is “pretty”.  I think it looks like a bunch of impressionistic painters and their cats got run over by a rock crusher.

Today Lemurita came to me and said “Lemur-Dad, can we take something apart?”

Well, far be it for me to tell her “No, Lemurita, we can’t destroy anything today” when it is clearly not true.  You can destroy something every day of your life if you are gifted.  We went out to the garage to look for something to cannibalize or outright destroy.

Lemurita firmly refuses to let me anywhere near the transmission of her mom’s car even though I swear to her that we’d put it back right where we found it and even though I tell her that taking apart a CVT drive system would be the pinnacle of our lives and quite possibly the lives of three generations of Lemurs to come.  “NO!  You’d never get it back together!”  Cruel Wife came into the room and said “That’s RIGHT, Lemurita.  Don’t you pay any attention to your dad.”

Update:  After promising Lemurita that the odds were good that Cruel Wife would birth puppies if we took her transmission apart she changed her tune and insisted that NOW we be allowed to take her CVT tranny out and have our way with it.  What Lemurita does not realize is that Cruel Wife has already donated a sewing machine to our efforts.  Yes, Lemurita and Lemur-Dad are going to start taking apart a sewing machine soon.  I think it will be a blast.

I looked at the fridge in the garage and the motor was just going to be too much hassle to get to even with the Sawzall, which is the only way I will work on a fridge.  Either that or a sledgehammer.

We grabbed a hard drive I had sitting in a moldering pile of old hard drives, motherboards, and obsolete video cards.  I suppose I could have spent some time pondering if there was something still valuable on it but if it was in a pile of hard drives sitting on top of the woodburning stove, unattended and unloved, then I’m of the opinion that it probably wasn’t high-importance – and if it was… oops.

We drilled it out and cracked open the case, we studied the ultra-lightweight heads, the drive head mechanism and the magnets, and we asked ourselves why the mechanism is so stiff and the magnets so beefy (it’s all about quick crisp response).

We handed it over to Franken-Boy who did his part with the first contact (look at the platter at the 3:30 location) and promptly went back to playing Skylander.

She immediately said “What else can we take apart??”

I looked at Cruel Wife guiltily.  “I’m afraid I’ve given her the ‘Take-Apart Bug’.  I’m so sorry.

CW just looked at me and grinned.  She’s an engineer, I’m an engineer… she knows the score.

 

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Enjoy by printed date.

CW and I made some sausages and Zatarain’s™ rice and beans for dinner because we’re just plain tuckered out.  It’s salty as hell but it’s cheaper than food, so what the hell, right?

For the benefit of our health I took some mixed greens and sorted out the gooey bits that are always in the mix no matter how fresh.  If you think your source of greens is without a gooey piece in there you need to sort it a bit more.  Green salad makings are fragile.  Unless you sort that stuff you are just asking to shovel something in your mouth that is going to negatively impact the flavor and experience.

There was a tub of feta cheese in the fridge that wasn’t working too hard and I pulled it out and put it on the counter.

We ate our main course and I got up to get my salad.  Greens, check.  Feta, check.  Low fat italian dressing, check.  I love a good salad, I really do, but normally we cut up a huge cucumber or get some green beans going or some such thing and don’t get them as often as I’d like.  I’m a freshness freak and the Green Goddess dressing wasn’t catching my eye so I just left it there – perhaps it would be fresher tomorrow.

Italian dressing… uh… hold on… loose cap… crusty stuff…  (sniff)… ooooh… rancid oil.  While I love me a good helping of rancid dressing it doesn’t like me.  Into the garbage it went.  Green Goddess remained in the fridge.  I wasn’t ready to face rejection there on top of the way things were going.

I should note that normally I make the salad dressing on the fly with my own balsamic, good oil, mandarin oranges, etc.  We use the inferior bottled stuff when I don’t feel like going through the effort.

Pantry raid.  Surely we had another bottle in the pantry?  Oh yes, we did.  Goody goody goody goody.  Ok, well, let’s just see how fresh the stuff is…

Okay… best by… let’s see… April 25… okay, so it’s probably just fine then so I’ll…

What???

Best by 4/25… 2002

Hey, CW!  When was the last other time we bought some balsamic and oil dressing?  Take a guess.  No, you’re off by nine years – it’s ten years to the day past it’s “Enjoy by” date.  I don’t think I’ll bother to sniff this one – that ok with you?

I know when I’m being given a hint.  Clearly a salad was not in our future.

Sure enough, looking at the horoscope:

Your sign is on the wane.  Do not buy a lottery ticket and face up to the odds that today may suck so badly that you experience negative pressure.  Avoid tattoos, pub crawls, remodeling, organ transplants (or organ donation), and enemas.  Do not eat salads or any chicken dishes for takeout chinese today.  Think about staying in bed with the covers over your head – it might not help but it can’t hurt.  Much.

****

If you ever played D&D you probably know of at least one person that made a session (or several) about as fun as a paper cut between the fingers from the full length of an 11×17 sheet.  Yes, I knew of two such people.  Married, if I recall.  Both were broken toys in my opinion by the time the last session rolled around when I finally had enough of the whacked-out drivel I kept hearing.  I might have used more tact, I’m sure, but dammit, they were PETA members and were really getting on my nerves with this fixation on their culinary superiority.

Anyway, this has gone beyond what I meant to say.  There’s always a person like that at some point in your wanderings and Cracked.com did a bang-up job describing how one such degenerating D&D scenario might go down.

****

And while we are talking about the sanctity of marriage… Not that we were, actually, but if we had been discussing the sanctity of marriage we might get on the topic of becoming an ordained minister.

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Got a call from the sitter today.  My daughter had issues at both ends – projectile from one led to explosive reaction at the other.  That is as delicately as I can put it.

Cruel Wife was leaving work at that time anyway and said “Work the extra you need to work and then come home, I’ll deal with it.”

I came in the door and gagged.

Franken-Boy was playing on the Wii, oblivious.  Cruel Wife was in the laundry.  I gagged some more.

CW came up and saw my stomach was rolling and said “Go on, get out of here.”

I leaped at the chance to go to the local CVS to get Ritz™ crackers and some Sprite™ because they just plain stay down easier.  And I figured Girlhead might have an easier time of it, too.

Guess what?  I came back in the door and was exposed to it all over again.

That time I made it to the bathroom as the nausea swelled, but… nope.  Nothing.

I have a really sensitive nose – I’m the canary in the coal mine.  Years ago I went down the street to a buddy’s store and said “Dude, did something burn up today?”

“No.”

“Well, I’m smelling something hot.”

“Can’t smell a thing.”

“Well, I’m telling you something is not right.”

“Nope.  Nothing.”

The next day I came in and he said “Dude, we had a fire last night.  Lucky the place did not burn down.”  He then led me to the spot where a cord to one of the coolers had failed and resulted in a big black section of wall.

As I tell CW, “The nose knows.”

The smell is not getting better.  I’m not getting used to it.

So the question I have is this:

In general, are all men wussier than women when it comes to smells, or are men just by nature given more sensitive schnozzes, or am I a total wimp?

I’m pretty sure I’m a wimp, but I’m curious about the thoughts on the other parts of the question.

****
I do work with this one machine shop all the time and have for the last 12 years or so.

So today my buddy Steel Nerves stopped by. He said a friend’s boy is autistic, too (like mine, but worse, as you’ll see). His buddy asked his son to go to the fridge and get a beer. The kid went and got it and just stood there in front of his dad as you can imagine a totally literal autistic kid would.

So the Dad says, “Don’t just stand there, throw that beer over here.”

Now, if you are the parent of an autistic kid you will understand exactly what I mean when I said my warning bells started to ring shrilly. I said “Oh, no, Steel Nerves… tell me he didn’t…”

Steel Nerves nods and says “Yup, kid hauls off and chucks that bottle as hard as he can and it hits his dad square in the center of the forehead – CRACK! He came around to tell me about it, sporting a HUGE lump dead-center of the forehead – black and blue, mostly black.”

I said “SHEEEIT, Steel Nerves! How old is the boy?”

“Sixteen. Knocked his Dad right the **** out,” and nods matter of factly.

Can you imagine how hard a sixteen year old could hurl a beer bottle at your forehead? Damn.

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A bit over a week ago I had that cold/flu/ebola thing that just kicked the everloving stuffing out of me.  I worked from home Wednesday and then returned to work the rest of the week, unable to hear a damn thing – this is not a good thing when you started life with only half your hearing in the first place, because what is left is at a premium. And then there were the headaches.  And toothaches.  And the green stuff.

After searching the web:

First try a saline spray, decongestant, or antihistamine.

I was later told that all of the above were bad and no-no-offlimitsverbotenevil.  It was explained to me that using one of those came with a high risk of tearing the fabric of space and time, possibly leading to a resurgence of Richard Simmons exercise re-runs on prime-time TV, and nobody wants that.

Staying well hydrated can keep nasal secretions flowing freely, preventing stuffiness that can harbor infection.

If staying well-hydrated were of universally huge benefit, people would not have to see the doctor ever, would they?  I drank as much coffee, tea, and Red Bull™ as I could choke down, to no effect.  Additionally, I have never been accused of being “stuffy”.

Capsaicin pepper spray is an alternative remedy showing some promise.

Take it from me, Michigan-legal pepper spray does NOTHING for your sinuses beyond making you wish you could die an instant death, so just don’t even go there.  They are full of sh*t.  There’s absolutely no promise to pepper spray beyond the one of intense agony.  Fool me once, shame on you… fool me seventeen times shame on me.  But it was worth a shot.

If symptoms persist, talk to your doctor about prescription remedies. Antibiotics can cure bacterial infections and reduce swelling in sinuses.

Yeah.  Ok.  Symptoms persisted.  The web says go see a doctor.

What’s that, Cruel Wife?  You’ve been saying that for days?  Sure you have.  I’d have noticed.

So the doc said Friday morning that it is not an ear infection.  She had to say it several times apparently because I was not looking at her the first few times.  Nope, it’s a raging nasty sinus infection.  That made sense because she had just looked up my nose and muttered something about greens and reds and:

“Yuk, gross.”

With the ink still wet on the Rx in my hand I left the office, dragging myself across the waiting room floor for the amusement of the other patients.

The doc insisted that the current disease floating around seems to snicker at Zithromax and then turn around and smack you a few more times for giving it any hassle.  Zithromax then goes and sits on the bench, wishing it could someday be in the major leagues.  Well, she didn’t say that, but I thought it.

The pill, (the color of an inflamed internal organ, interestingly) is roughly the size of an obese ping-pong ball or a hairless hamster without legs.  It appears to be covered in a leathery shell and studded with Teflon™ covered spikes to make it go down easier.

Two days later I’m still kind of feeling like I’ve been eaten by ravenous wolves, improperly digested, crapped out, and re-shaped into a thing resembling a Lemur.

“Have patience!” the Medicos say.  “It usually takes (wait… what day is this? two days?) … uh, THREE days for the stuff to work.”

So much for nine days ago when I thought “Meh, this is just a wimpy little bug, life will go on and I will laugh it off! (ho ho ho ho)”  I guess you don’t always get to make that call.  My boss was out two weeks and then still has had a day here and there out sick so it could be worse, hm?

At the moment I am very very energy-less.  Feel ok for a bit, get ambitious about some big project like picking up a piece of paper on the floor, and CRASH – woozy and as listless as a Occupy America devotee.

Because of all of this I suggest very strongly that you avoid getting the currently circulating cold/flu/ebola/listeria-pox thing lest it dissolve into the green phlegm of sinus hell.  It’s not worth your time.

****

Right after the doctor visit, I picked up my new reading glasses.  Friday night I asked Girlhead “Ok, be truthful, do you think the new glasses look cool or do they just make me look old?”

She looked at me with this grin and said “No, Dad, they make you look like a GEEK.”

I did ask for honesty, and the girl is brutally honest.  Always has been.  I like that about her.  My opinion is if you don’t want the truth, don’t ask.  Or, even if you don’t like the truth, don’t blame the person you asked because… you asked.

“Yeah, but is it geeky in a good way or in a bad way?”

(Pausing to consider)  “Good, I think.”

“Well, that’s a relief.”

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Lamborghini making an SUV.

No, that is not an SUV, it is a FWIT (F***ing What Is That?).

This is like surgically altering a cat to be an alligator that is vegan.  It fails on every single level measurable to mankind.

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William Kristol is not perfect but (a) I like him, and (b) I respect his opinion.  It’s no secret that Romney isn’t the guy I’d pick to be president but in a choice between him and Obama I’ll take Romney and dance in the streets (while still hoping for that giant asteroid strike, but still happier than I would otherwise be).

I do believe his take on what it will take to beat Obama.  Act like a president… like a LEADER.  He’s quite correct that to get down in the mud and poo-flinging trenches with the dems is a losing battle since they are much better at petty sh*t.

But if he allows the race to degenerate into name-calling and gotcha gimmicks, he could lose. Democrats are better than Republicans at the small and nasty stuff.  – William Kristol

I agree.  I have run into this firsthand with several liberals.  When you try to have an intellectual debate and they find themselves confronted with a well reasoned argument that they don’t like they storm away angrily and offended at your gall for your un-compassionate misanthropic world-view.  This happened one day at work as I discussed Global Warming with a liberal co-worker.  Every statement he uttered was a textbook bullet-point.  When he claimed that only 3% of scientists held views counter to AGW, I looked at him with utter disbelief and flat out told him that he needs to stop reading the propaganda and actually research rather than parrot off things that are completely false.  He then stormed away muttering “Well, maybe YOU don’t care about destroying your children’s world but I won’t do that to MY children.”

Hey, if he truly believes that, I can commend him on his principles and devotion to his children.  But I can also call him out for making arguments that are outlandish and supposedly are self-evident and self-supporting, needing no defense or foundation.

Update:  Climate Alarmist Calls for Burning Down Skeptic’s Homes

See the thought process there?  “Well, why not?  If they won’t listen to me, I have every right to burn down their homes.”   Lot of ego wrapped up in that broken toy.

So Romney needs to ignore every damn thing Obama says.  He needs to talk about what he will do and not once attack Obama.  He needs to be of the mindset that he can say something that cuts his opponent deeply and gives them pause about pulling such crap while staying classy and move right along to the important things.

He doesn’t have the luxury for getting bogged down in the childish antics of the buffoon that currently holds the office that I admire.  I once got to see Clinton speak and it was an honor to see the President, it was repulsive to see Clinton.  The two can co-exist.  I don’t know if I could pull it off so easily if Obama had been in that place at that time.  At least Clinton has brains.  He actually did know how to lead.  I disagreed with damn near everything he stood for but I’d take him over what we have now.

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There are some things that are just so weird that when you try to dress it up and claim that the condition needs “acceptance” I don’t even consider the notion, such as with liberalism.  Also, phantom genitalia fall under that rainbow-colored umbrella of bizzarro-ness.  Thank you, FARK.

’I sometimes wake up thinking I have a penis…’

As do many men, then they either speak to their wives or they go to work.   (Joking about the first one)

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Please do note that this is a whimsical post.  Only if I had lots of money sticking out of every orifice would I buy one for myself.  As a group gift for someone in the service – oh yeah, absolutely.

My energy comes and goes.  Did ok for the first half-day at work and then admitted defeat.  I’ll pick up more tonight after a break.  Whatever flu or cold virus this was that bit me was one mean hombre.  I cannot hear jack shit at the moment – to the point of reading everyone’s lips and even so much that I can’t hear my own footsteps in a normal stride.  Going to the doc tomorrow to make sure this isn’t something scary-bad with my ears.

So this is a shorter post, but damn is it awesome.

Friends and family of servicemen and servicewomen (AKA our Armed Forces) of these most awesome US of A, you must get them a Battle Mug™.  That is, if it isn’t over some weight or size restriction.  At least for when they’re home…

Ok, here’s their pitch:

Battle Mug starts life as a 13.5 pound solid block of 6061 T6 billet aluminum before it enters a state of the art CNC facility in Huntsville, Alabama. This facility produces specialized parts and equipment for the U.S. Department of Defense, major weapons manufacturers, NASA, and a host of other companies working at the U.S. Rocket and Space Center.

Built to military specifications, Battle Mug features a M1913 rail interface system which allows the operator to mount a standard issue M4 carry handle, tactical light, laser device, holographic sight (we call them beer goggles) or even a bayonet for close quarters, high risk operations.

Each individually serialized Battle Mug is built with the Operator in mind and features Mil-Spec Type III anodizing and a crenelated base.

A MIL Spec 8625 coating is a hard-coat anodized aluminum.  This will withstand a washing machine for about 150 years.  Tough enough to put on our weapons, it’s going to handle milk, beer, 151 rum, and av-gas about the same.

6061-T6/651 is ubiquitous… it’s like cats or $20 bills on Friday night at a pub.  But a solid block is a darn thick billet of material to start out with for a mug this size.

Putting a picatinny rail on it just makes sense.  Whether you need a laser or a flashlight attachment in order to drink properly and safely, the option is there.  I imagine a scope or a foam suppressor would work well there, too.  And an EOTech Holosight™ would make a FINE addition.

There’s just one teensy hitch… it’s pricey.  Granted you’ll never need a mug again.

Oh, and aluminum conducts heat… 150 W/m*k and that means you better drink ‘em fast unless your beer is already warm (a good dark brew this doesn’t matter so much).  And hot things won’t stay hot for long.  But dammit, it looks awesome.

If they make one out of titanium, such as Ti 6Al-4V with a thermal conductivity around 6 W/m*K… Be DAMN spendy, but once I win the lottery I’ll be contacting them to see if they’re willing to experiment.  Not sure if a Ti anodized surface (AMS 2488 Type II) would be “food safe” or not.

Shorter post, my ass.  I must be feverish again.

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If this guy isn’t a late-stage meth addiction poster-child, I’ll eat my shorts.

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Children are not legally able to consent or not regarding anything, much less DNA sampling.  Unless it is killing unborn children, I guess.  Yes, I know, in the state of California it is – it is in the article.

Also, suppose this is just a save-work measure, why take samples if they don’t intend to use them if they find something?

“These are interviews, not interrogations,” Sheriff’s Deputy Jason Ramos told ABCNews.com. “They are all consensual. Once it’s done, there is a mechanism in place for school administrators to notify parents.”

It’s consensual after the DNA is taken, and then we’ll ask the parents’ permission.  Yeah.

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Thank God for the 2nd Amendment.

It’ll be on the block soon.  They are already tracking people via credit cards and atm cards.  Now is the in-your-face takeover in front of your very eyes.

Yes, the black box recorder in your car.

Of course the information belongs to you, the consumer, only accessible if the government gets permission first.  No, it’s just not an issue that you have no use for the information yourself, the important thing is that you have it.  Just in case.  Because we’re looking out for you, Mr. Joe and Mrs. Suzy American.

Trust us.

Although the text of legislation states that such data would remain the property of the owner of the vehicle, the government would have the power to access it in a number of circumstances, including by court order, if the owner consents to make it available, and pursuant to an investigation or inspection conducted by the Secretary of Transportation.  – InfoWars.com

Notice “including” but not limited to court order.  So in other sorts of “heightened circumstances” other methods are available.  Why have our elected reps and senators decided that this is what America really wants?  Could it REALLY be that a large percentage of people like the idea of a black box that records everything they do in their car?  Seriously?  Of course a great many folks like OnStar as well, so I guess there’s not much intelligence floating around free for the asking.

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Hey, North Korea is warning us that our refusal to send them food after they sent up a rocket (ahem: quasi-ballistic missile) constitutes a hostile act.

And in true “I know you are but what am I?” fashion we’ve hinted darkly at… things.

At the U.N. in New York, U.S. Ambassador Susan Rice said the Security Council stood ready to take action should there be “further acts, either missile launches or further nuclear test.”

“One would hope, against past precedent, that the leadership in North Korea will see the wisdom of not pursuing further provocations,” she added.

Yeah, and if they… uh… provoke us further we’ll DOUBLE-WITHHOLD food.  No, seriously.  If you aren’t going to do anything more than sanctions or withholding of food that China will provide if no one else will, then what the hell is the point in even talking about anything?  They do whatever the hell they want anyway.

Stop giving them food.  Stop giving them oil.  Stop talking to the little dictators and feeding their egos.

Shit, I know this much from dealing with a cat that yowls to be fed whenever he wants.

****

Heyyyyy… Hamster Villa In France Allows Humans To Live Like Hamsters

Go read the article.  The points I wanted to make are:

… Villa Hamster, a hotel that allows guests to give up the daily stresses of being human and try out life as a hamster.

The Villa … has been modernized for the 21st century human-hamster hybrid, with cages for rooms, hay stacks instead of beds and human-sized running wheels….

The guests have the option of wearing little hamster hoodies as well.

… instead of the normal French cuisine items… the guests eat organic hamster grains served in little containers and sip water on all fours.

The idea of spending a week in France imitating a hamster may sound bizarre, but Falquerho says there are a lot of people who are fulfilling a lifelong dream.

“The hamster in the world of children is that little cuddly animal,” he told Reuters. “Often, the adults who come here have wanted or did have hamsters when they were small.”

Hey, yeah, ok… do they realize that real-life hamsters are cannibals?  No, really.

If your room-mate at this hotel dies in the middle of the night peacefully or in a fit of passion – it is your duty to eat them.  Like a good hamster would.

****

I wonder if Obama is going to sign off on this pipeline after all his bluster about bringing down oil prices for Joe and Suzy American?

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Wow.  The idea of pot-smoking in Eugene, Oregon is just mind-blowing.

That means… one tiny atom in this duck’s webbed foot could be one little tiny universe…

(Please God, tell me someone recognizes the source of the bastardized quote and why it is funny on a couple of levels… think of it as a fun game)

****

Ooh.  Found a good quote:

There must be a ‘jackass award’ on just about every GSA leader’s desk since the Vegas junket is clearly just the tip of the iceberg.  - Rep. John Mica (R-Fla.), who chairs the House Transportation and Infrastructure Committee, which has jurisdiction over the GSA

Well, anyone who has jurisdiction or was in any way related to the agency was either blind, asleep, incompetent, or complicit – just the same as anyone in the GSA.  Sorry, word of stuff like that gets around.

****

Uncle Ted, while I think you’re great, your choice of free speech is less than measured.  An American ought to be able to say what he thinks but the reality is you’re sticking your hand into a hornet’s nest when all you needed to do was mention that political insect killer was what is called for.

Things like this just ain’t none too bright:

“It’s good people who bent over and let the enemy in. If the coyote’s in your living room pissing on your couch, it’s not the coyote’s fault. It’s your fault for not shooting him.”  Nugent had said in his address that “if Barack Obama becomes the president in November, I will either be dead or in jail by this time next year.”  – Ted Nugent, exercising his God-given right to free political speech even if it sounds like more than that  (Source:  WND.com)

Yeah.

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Some sort of flu or cold or something.  I know it involves 36+ hours of horrible cheek and brow pain (sinuses), lots of coughing (lungs, duh), and joint pain.  Fever.  Did I forget the fever?

Praying the family doesn’t get it.  I went into this thinking “Yep, just gonna tough this out, I’ll be fine.”

Day 1:  Can’t… stop… coughing… it’s like… I have… a… wet… kitten… in my lungs.

Day 2:  Yep, it’s uncomfortable but that never stopped nobody, right?  Just means I’m ALIVE.  HA!  Where’s that cold medicine?  Whaddya mean I took some only an hour ago?

Day 3:  Damn, no painkiller I have works on this face pain.  (And I still have plenty of painkillers, none do a damn thing)  Damn. And it hurts bad.  And it doesn’t stop.  Ow.  *$(# me.  102F fever.  Huh.

Day 4: (4:30am) Almost fell asleep, damn cat yowled just as I fell asleep.  %&@(!@ cat.  If it is so cold in here why are the sheets sticking to me?

Day 5: (today) You know how I said I was going to work tomorrow?  Uh, about that…  Hey, are solid clumps of blood supposed to come out your sinuses?  Ew.

So maybe I had a mild case of Ebola.  Who knows?

I do know that I can’t hear jack shit.  Luckily I can read lips so if Cruel Wife wants me to understand all she has to do is get my attention and we can go from there.  Seriously, there’s so much crap in my ears I can’t hear hardly anything.  And my hearing sucked before…

I do know that after the last five years I hate doctors.  When I can’t fight them off you can take me to see one.

****

Oh yes… about the continued erosion of your rights.  Michigan DNR invades farms, forces farmers to kill stock personally while they watch.

Seriously.

****

Oh, about those toys you need… here they are.   Greatest toy in the universe might be stretching it if you are a guy past the age of puberty and discovered girls but hell, this might even come third place.  Six legged r/c robots.

****

It’s not really paranoia if they are truly out to get you.  You could be wrong, but what if you’re not?  Door alarm!

What kid couldn’t have used this one growing up?

****

If I had tried this excuse to get out of a ticket I’d have been nailed for being a smartass.  proofofinnocence

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Romney is appealing to my pro-gun nature by telling me what Obama is going to do to my gun rights if he gets re-elected.

Well, friggin’ DUH.  I knew that much, you bonehead.

“If we are going to safeguard our 2nd Amendment, it is time to elect a president who will defend the rights President Obama ignores or minimizes. I will.” - The latest in a long stream of RINO’s, Mitt Romney

Just what we need – a leader to tell us that ducks like water, that rain is wet, unrefrigerated mayonnaise is bad, and that rabid skunks don’t make good pets.

Tell me something I don’t know, like what YOU will do to ensure that states are controlled by the federal government in only one way when it comes to guns:  That the right to keep and bear arms will not be infringed at any level.  Saying “He won’t, I will” tells me nothing.  As a governor who championed health care after being elected in a liberal state, he doesn’t gain unconditional and total acceptance from me without demonstrating a commitment and telling me of a solution that he might have in this area.  I’m not fond of gun regulations that only hinder law-abiding citizens and put them at risk if they defend themselves.

Really,  though, my disgust is irrelevant.  It’s not like I have any choice – because primaries are not done all in one day the first states out of the gate pretty much decide what oversized, patched, mismatched, gaudy-colored hand-me-down candidates I get to choose from.  So my choice is now Romney or Obama.  That’s not a choice.

Even that was an illusion of choice.  It wouldn’t matter who won the nod from the republicans (besides Paul), the vote is not really FOR a candidate, it is AGAINST Obama.  Plain and simple, Ron Paul’s approach would be draconian and mess things up by trying do eliminate too much at once.

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Let me ask you this…  Would THIS happen if everyone had guns with which to defend themselves?

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Update:

The kid health issue is getting better.  Manageable.  Cruel Wife is looking for gainful employment in a different establishment so wish her luck.  I think she has a good prospect already.  I’m still an asshole.  Franken-Boy is still a nutjob but the odds are he’ll remain one until he’s 27 or married, whichever comes last.

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Oh, well, that makes sense then…

Mayor Rahm Emanuel went on the defensive Thursday about a surge of recent homicides in Chicago and questioned why new law enforcement tactics hadn’t been created before he was elected 10 months ago.

You can say, ‘Are you doing it right,’” Emanuel said, “but the question is, ‘Why were those policies not done before?‘”  – NBC Chicago

A side note – I think we can assume that Rahm helped firm up Obama’s skillset in the area of redirecting blame.

To answer Rahm’s question – - – it’s probably Bush’s fault.

Well, why the hell not?  It’s the answer to every other ill that has happened on a liberal’s watch.
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New Black Panther chief of staff Michelle Williams (as reported by WTSP.com):

Michelle said during that interview, “Let me tell you, the things that’s about to happen, to these honkeys, these crackers, these pigs, these pink people, these —- people. It has been long overdue. My prize right now this evening … is gonna be the bounty, the arrest, dead or alive, for George Zimmerman. You feel me?”

Then later after she “apologizes” she says:

In a candid moment during her 10 News interview, she said, “Do I want to see George Zimmerman dead? No. Do I want to see him brought to justice? Hell yes.”

Michelle assured us that she doesn’t want to have anyone out there pick up a gun. “I don’t want violence, I don’t promote violence. That’s why I told you, my words were out of anger.”

But didn’t she say earlier that her prize would be “the bounty, the arrest, dead or alive, for George Zimmerman”?  I’m confused.  But if we take her at her word, picking up a tree limb and bludgeoning Zimmerman to death would be A-OK in her book.

Could we also assume that to her the word “apologize” means anything but the spin South Park puts on Jesse Jackson’s definition of “apologize”?

Anyway, she’s just another of a long line of leftist turds who only apologize when they realize that no one is going to back them up after their bullsh*t behavior, and as a result only petulantly give what seems like an apology but amounts to “I’m sorry you got offended when I told you the truth”.

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Speaking of not having your bullsh*t behavior backed up

Democrats have engaged in a full-court press in pushing back on strategist Hilary Rosen’s comment on CNN Wednesday night that as a wealthy stay-at-home-mom Ann Romney “never worked a day in her life.”

Rosen apologized to Romney Thursday, but only after kicking up a firestorm over stay-at-home motherhood and drawing a rebuke from the president himself.

Apologized “but only after kicking up a firestorm”?  Seriously, a journalism major wrote this?  How/why in the hell would anyone apologize before kicking up a firestorm?

Obama kicked the few teeth she had remaining clear into the back of her throat (yay):

“There is no tougher job than being a mom,” President Obama told a Cedar Rapids television station, mentioning his own wife and mother. He added, “I don’t have a lot of patience for commentary about the spouses of political candidates. My general view is those of us who are in the public life, we’re fair game. Our families are civilians.”

Oh, I don’t know – being a dad isn’t always a walk in the park, either, you nimwit.  And if you were obliquely referring to Michelle as being a civilian, not when she pushes meal choices on our military and engages in indoctrination of our kids she’s not.

Hey, here’s another “apology”!

“As a mom I know that raising children is the hardest job there is. As a pundit, I know my words on CNN last night were poorly chosen,” Rosen said in a statement Thursday afternoon. “I apologize to Ann Romney and anyone else who was offended. Let’s declare peace in this phony war and go back to focus on the substance.”

“… to Ann Romneyand anyone else who was offended”.

That is the CLASSIC apology that says “I’m sorry you couldn’t take my truths,”  which is really no apology at all.  She’d have been more convincing if she’d said through clenched teeth, “I apologize to Ann Romney (da bitch)”.

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Lost sight of how to keep up with peripheral visionary Dennis Leary’s song “Asshole”?  Why, here is just the thing for you.  Cracked.com has a list of gags that only a sociopath would use.  I would have used one of these on Cruel Wife if I hadn’t blown it by reading to her the title of the article.

I would use #6 on her but then she’d get me back with #2… and she’d win.

#3 is pure unalloyed Evil, however.

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A South Jersey man has come up with what he hopes is a solution to a controversy over the American flag that he flew in his yard — a flag bearing the image of President Barack Obama in place of the field of stars. Wes Kennedy, of the Acacia housing development in Lumberton, says he had no idea some of his neighbors had a problem with his flag until reporters started calling and telling him.  – Philadelphia CBS Local

You hang an adulterated US flag with a picture of a controversial bonehead on it and it never occurred that it might not be popular?  Riiiiiight.

“If someone had come to me in the beginning, I would have said, ‘Let’s sit down and talk to see what we might reasonably come up with as a solution.’”

Again:  Riiiiiiight.

Once he became aware of their objections, Kennedy worked out his own solution.

He’s taken the flag down and replaced it with two separate flags — one, the standard stars and stripes, and the second a picture of Obama.

Kennedy hopes his neighbors are happy, though he’s not sure.

“In Acacia, there are some angry, maybe even evil-minded people about Obama,” he tells KYW Newsradio.

Evil-minded?  Is that what we’re calling patriotism and respect for the flag now?  Must be lib-speak.

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It’s really all about racism.

I’ve been bothered by the shooting of this kid down in Florida on several levels.

One – both sides have rushed to judgment.  One side says the guy is a racist who shot an innocent unarmed kid wearing a hoodie and packing naught but a bag of Skittles – packing Skittles while black (PSWB).  On the other side the kid was a problem in school, had a lot of jewelry (women’s), nailed for having pot, and was physically beating the gun owner.  It goes back and forth with both sides making arguments both ways.  Police were wrong, gun owner wrong, and kid was wrong – all bandied about.  Some say the shooter was bloody and others point to video tape of the guy looking unbloodied.

We’ll have to see what comes out of the courts because when it gets this messy it needs to move to a higher power.  And court doesn’t mean the truth will out, either.

Two – racism is really running rampant.  In all directions.  But it is most certainly not a case of all whiteys trying to stomp on the black man.  It just isn’t so.  It’s not.

So there is no misunderstanding, if the gun owner did shoot the kid and it was due to racism and it sucks ass, but it doesn’t really matter – what matters is he shot the kid and shooting someone without just cause is illegal.  We just don’t know yet what the circumstances were.  Right now everyone has jumped to their conclusions.  And they keep jumping still.

Secondly, I’m kind of disturbed by the black community’s leaders.

Specifically I’m referring to Sharpton and Jackson but it goes broader than that.  I get it – they go around the country and point to high-profile cases like this and make their arguments that there’s still something wrong and that racism still exists.  Hey, I’ve got no disagreement with that statement.

But if those two were really caring about black kids and blacks in general – they would go around just as much and denounce the black-on-black and black-on-white crimes just as much as they do for white-on-black crimes.  Instead, they whip up pure emotions and help get the tinderbox extremely hot.

Think about this… if they really cared about something outside themselves these guys would be not only championing those who they believe have been victims but they would hold up those kids in the same communities who do wrong themselves.  They should be championing those who are clearly wronged and denouncing those who do wrong regardless of the color of their skin.

And I would support them on that.  I really would.  I can respect someone who recognizes wrong but tries to be fair.

But instead, black leaders – be they Obama, Sharpton, Jackson, or even clowns like Spike Lee (who is nothing short of an evil bastard for screwing with two old people and not apologizing to them) – are focusing on what they see as a one-sided issue, and that is just as racist.  The black leaders that are most in fashion today cannot possibly hope to take a moral high ground unless they act as a voice for reason, restraint, and recognition of truths.  These leaders are about anything but recognition of truths.

Recognition of truths and leadership is not about saying that the dead kid would look like your son if you had one.  That shows no leadership at all – it shows manipulation and emotionalism.  A good leader does manipulate but they do it to play to people’s strengths, not their basest and darkest emotions for their own gain.

One truth is that the black community has already done and is doing what Obama has been doing for years.  Obama has blamed his predecessor for all of his own shortcomings and argued that since there were legacies from the Bush administration that were inherited then all problems stem from the same root cause.   The same has been happening with the black community – blame for everything resides outside of one’s self, and is never recognized.  Broken families, gangster-worship, and a dependence upon others rather than persevering and truly coming together is not doing anyone any favors.  There is indeed racism that blacks still see, and this is not up for debate, but it is made far worse by a sickeningly high degree of cultural illness from the poison that flows in parts of the black community.

It’s not about Sharpton, Obama, Jackson, or any leader past or present in the Black Panthers.   I guess it really IS about merchandising.  It’s about what these guys are trying to sell and what people are buying.  What people are buying is the crack cocaine of righteousness.  They’re dropping dimes for a bump of the meth of emotionalism.  They keep chasing the dragon with the heroin of victimization.

If George Zimmerman is not arrested in the shooting death of Trayvon Martin soon, theRev. Al Sharpton will call for an escalation in peaceful civil disobedience and economic sanctions. – Orlando Sentinel

The difficulty here is that Sharpton’s words “escalation in peaceful civil disobedience” can only incite others to stronger reaction.  A real leader is cognizant of the effects that words have on people.

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And apparently it is O-KAY for a black guy to kill a black guy because after all, they’re brothers.

I guess it is just something a cracker wouldn’t understand.

Grandma, I’ve been shot.  – 5 year old Mckayla after being shot at a wake outside of a nursing home.

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In what is arguably one of Obama’s more sinister moves:

The president spoke at length about the case at a joint press conference with the leaders of Mexico and Canada. The president, adopting what he described as the language of conservatives who fret about judicial activism, questioned how an “unelected group of people” could overturn a law approved by Congress.

This from the guy who is a self-proclaimed “constitutional law professor”… talk about egregious.
The system of Checks and Balances (trias politica) is set up for exactly the type of limitation of one branch of another – a limiting of the power wielded.  One of their responsibilities:  “Exercise judicial review, reviewing the constitutionality of laws“.
Obama intended to take a cheap shot, claiming parity – suggesting that conservative disagreement with SCOTUS’ ruling on Roe v. Wade is grounds for the conservatives to sit down and shut up.   There is nothing analogous between the ruling that allows killing of babies and a power grab by a overzealous group of liberal Congress members that has at it’s basis the twisting of the Commerce Act far beyond it’s intended scope.

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When emergency crews respond to a car or building fire in Passaic, a bill might soon be sent out.  – cbslocal.com

Hmmm.  Yeah.  So it is “We’ll take your taxes so we can save your shiat, but if you actually need us we’re going to bill you for the cost of us having to roll for you.”

What, they penalize people for using services they paid for already?

When the Passaic City Council meets next Tuesday, Mayor Alex Blanco said what they will not decide to do is levy fees against people in car accidents or building owners whose structures catch fire.

What they will do is go after the insurance companies.

If you are a policy owner, you are already paying for it — this fire department service charge provision,” the mayor told WCBS 880 reporter Levon Putney on Friday.

He said the fees would only be applied if claims are made, and no fees would be levied for those without insurance.

Does the Mayor just not get it?  If I’m a homeowner, I’m already paying for it by buying the firetrucks and paying the firemen’s salaries.

If you charge me for it on top of that and send it to my insurance saying I’m already paying for it, yes, and I’m going to pay again.  Three times in fact.

  1. Insurance premium
  2. Fire and emergency services
  3. Insurance premium goes up as insurance companies up their rates

The reporters says “Of course, a concern is that insurance companies will simply jack up their premiums.”

Mayor B responds:

“I feel that it would be unethical on their part,” Blanco said.

What would you bet that the mayor is and is surrounded by a bunch of liberal morons?  An insurance company concerned about ethics?

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Reportedly, microbiologist Dr. Coypu as found a link between common bread mold and black mold.  It is said that environmental stresses caused by common substances such as disinfectant, cat urine, and proximity to regular rapid heating and cooling cycles all can contribute to the expression of genes in a common bread mold that turn it into the much deadlier organism (S. chlorohalonata), with potent toxins and extreme tenacity.

This already makes it more difficult for people to have and feed children in the high-mold periods of spring and fall and we were very surprised to see a correlation with cat urine and disinfectant.  Perhaps some combination – a domestic trifecta, if you will – is what is putting families with small children and pets at high risk.  We are working closely with the CDC and NIH for both funding and guidance.  This is serious.

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