The Sith wanted a graphic, so a graphic she shall have…
I got my 32 oz Red Bull™, some jerky, and an iced tea. Iced tea is cheaper than water, did you know that? Go figure.
I walked up to the cash register. Cash Lady is a plain but amiable lady in her late 50′s.
Note: To quote the great Dave Barry – I swear I am not making this up.
Me: Howdy, Cash Lady. You having a good evening?
Cash Lady: Oh yes, fine, thanks.
Me: I think that’ll be it for me – how much do I owe you?
Cash Lady: That’ll be $7.31.
Me: All right, here you go…
Cash Lady: I have the next two days off.
Me: Really? I used to have Mondays and Tuesdays off. It was nice because errands became much easier.
Cash Lady: (She hands me my money) I suppose so. I’m excited because I get to go see Elvis.
Me: Beg pardon?
Cash Lady: Yes, he’s going to do five shows over at the park and I’m going to see every one of them.
Me: … … Uh. … … Elvis?
Cash Lady: Yes, I’ve wanted to see him for years.
Note: At this point, if she had reached under the counter to whip out a fresh harp seal and smacked me across the face with it I could not have been more surprised. I was literally dumbstruck for a few moments. I was lucky because I grasped for something to say and something was within reach – it’s one of those things that I store on one of my brain’s many shelves for just such an occasion – the occasions where nothing quite fits, like looking a Hallmark card that expresses “I’m sorry your stuffed cat got eaten by a giant rabid beaver”.
Me: Yeah, I bet. A lot of people say that.
Cash Lady: I’m so excited. I asked my boss for the time off and got it!
Me: Well, ok, ma’am… well… have a good evening and enjoy The King.
Cash Lady: Bye bye!