Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Archive for the ‘BS’ Category

(subtitled:  Stalling for Time)

I was waiting for a flight two nights ago, trapped in the decaying moments between slowed heartbeats. Time tides flowed sideways in irregular surges and only moved forward in regions of eddying currents.

Unexpectedly I got a call from a surprising source – nature.

It was one of those moments we all have had where pre-flight stress and a pepper jack fajita omelette collide with the grace of drunk hippos and your intestinal tract rebels against inaction.

In short, I needed a restroom, and I needed it RFN.

I tried the ages old Man Code usually reserved for selecting the proper urinal in order to locate a toilet stall but apparently multiple guys had also eaten pepper jack fajita omelettes earlier and the only other two empty stalls looked like they were crawling with Hepatitis A and unidentifiable parasites.  So neither Door #1 or Door #5 looked preferable to internal rupture and sepsis.

Thus, flanked by two used stalls I picked Door #3 and stepped inside. Trou droppage and the usual maneuvering went without incident, as one would expect given my lifetime of practice in such things.

As I sat there, wondering why my internal organs were suddenly being coy after such a cry and hue only moments earlier, I noticed in the stall to my left what seemed to be a large-ish deep-voiced gentleman having a conversation on his cellphone.

This struck me as an extremely peculiar place in which to carry on a conversation, even as humorous and good-natured as it seemed from his tone of voice. It also seemed obvious that he had a lot of luggage, judging by the thudding sounds and the shuddering of the stall walls.

He was saying “(indistrict conversation) Huh… ha, ha, ha… Uh huh.”

The pre-flight pharmaceuticals (legally prescribed) that I had ingested on orders of my physician were kicking in so it took a moment for my brain to process amongst more thudding noises the man’s next words “Heh heh uhhhhh… That stuff burns my scrotum… (Long pause)… We gotta do this again some time.”

The cure for intestinal hesitation is not “scary clowns” as you would be led to believe in the movie Zombieland, but rather the knowledge that you need to vacate several places – (intestinal and environmental) immediately unless you want to have a very awkward post flagrante delicto encounter with an amorous couple of guys in the men’s room of the airport in Portlandia.

Most of the experience could be considered horrible enough but such events in Portlandia of all places made the situation nigh on unbearable.

There was a crap-ton of hand soap at the sinks but nothing suitable or powerful enough with which to sanitize my now feverish brain. I quickly opted for a second round of pharmaceuticals after returning to my safe bench seat outside of the flow of time, and I continued to wait for my flight with a sense of newfound graceful patience.

There, McGoo… My story did not actually invoke King’s short story “The Jaunt” but there was an element of irony to be found here… My hair is now whiter.

****
Before I left on vacation I was nervous that I had forgotten something that someone would need for a project’s completion.  So a scientist suggested I put together a box which I named exactly as he said.  In true Mystery Science Theater 3000 (MST3K) fashion I gave it a ridiculous acronym.

Within minutes a note appeared next to it with a tiny box usually used for a 50 count of small fasteners.

humilityIt has been said that I have an ego.

And it was then also said that perhaps the box provided for my ego was actually several sizes too large.

I haven’t laughed tears like that in years.

“Arrogance must be earned.  Tell me what you did to earn yours.”  – House, M.D.

Read Full Post »

Airports, where time stops.

Cruel Wife and the kids dropped me off at PDX three hours early so they could make it to their hotel.

Honestly, I needed the down time. I hate goodbyes with family I see once a year.

Did you know that time stops in airports? Just like hospitals, courtrooms, funeral homes, and shopping malls.

But as I cruise the ‘net, I find interesting things, and this one brought a huge smile to my face. Not for the young victim, because nothing will fix him, and my heart bleeds for him. But the smile came from seeing this sorry sack of shit get what he has coming to him.

Actually he has more that he deserves, but I bet it will come to him soon enough.

The father is a saint, for having the self control to not kick the sick son of a bitch to death.

Yeah, you’ll have to pardon my frame of mind. I will be better in a few days.

an eternity later

Just saw Peter Ustinov. He shambled into the airport men’s room as I left it.

I am not sure which is more disturbing; Seeing Peter Ustinov or the realization of how old I have to be to recognize a long dead actor from so many years ago.

“Thirty five minutes” until my flight begins boarding. Might as well be like the Stephen King short story “The Jaunt”.

Read Full Post »

Stress Felines.

Several of us at work have been lobbying for a company feline.

A cat who wanders around and provides fuzz therapy to stressed out engineers. How could that go wrong? Relaxed laser engineers are engineers who do not read Braille.

I had thought a name that played on our company name would be good, as a mascot. After reconsideration, I believe I have a better name.

Karoshi

What better choice? It works on many levels. A hidden joke, a statement about the work environment, and a dig at cats, who generally are not known for being work beasts. Generally.

When the boss asks about the origin of the name I would just say “it is a Super Mario Kart character name.”

****

I hink I stole this from AG over at H&B.

20140704-031154-11514313.jpg

****
Spent the last week earning my arrogance – it requires yearly upkeep to keep your certs current. In a few more days… Vacation. A much needed vacation. Badly so.

Read Full Post »

We’ll start with ugly. This what I think Hell must sound like. Real crazy people shrieking and destroying an abandoned factory as therapy.

Ugly but funny is this item sent to me by Laconic Pup…

 

darkHaving a creeper not too long ago sneak into my house through an open door and blow up the center of my room – and every chest, furnace, and workbench – this one kind of hits home.  Damn creepers.

Now, simply the bad. Portsmouth Sinfonia.

What is interesting is not the music, although it made me laugh like a loon. What is interesting is the brain can tell you every single wrong note, which argues for even music being stored as a series of metaphors.

The good. Hmmm.

I am really not sure what this thing is but it makes me smile and makes me uneasy at the same time.

20140623-010723-4043984.jpg

Well go read some Real Science. Ought to cheer you up.

Or this.

20140623-012425-5065250.jpg

Read Full Post »

Today, the USPTO denied the Redskins their trademark on grounds that it was illegally insensitive and hurt some injun’s feelings somewhere.

Yes, in Colbert fashion I meant to illustrate the ridiculousness of the situation. (See “Sing-Song Chin-Chong” in any web search involving Colbert)

I ask you this: How many pro teams intentionally name their team and go by something meant disparagingly?

Do they have team names like:

Closet Wankers
Dripping Chihuahuas
Cone-Heads
Pocket Trouts
Thundering Manatees

No, they do not. You know why… Because they want to sound noble or fierce or they want to be proud of their mascot. They don’t pick disparaging terms, they just don’t.

So why do we give any attention to a bunch of wanks who say they are offended? To be denied a trademark, someone has to show damages.

****
Hey hey hey… Obama doesn’t need to ask Congressional approval in Iraq because, as his cheerleader San Fran Nan says, the authorities are already in place.

Pelosi told reporters that she agreed that the president has all of the authorities that he needs in the authorizations to use military force passed by Congress previously.

“All of the authorities are there. That doesn’t mean I want all of them to be used, especially boots on the ground,” she said. “But I definitely think the president has all of the authority he needs by dint of legislation that was passed in 2001 and 2003.”

She appeared to be referring to the authorizations to use military force passed after the Sept. 11, 2001 attacks and the 2002 authorization to use force in Iraq. Neither of those authorizations have expired, although the official White House position is that the Iraq authorization should be repealed.

Oh, the same authorities granted based on what the dems have called Bush/Cheney lies to invade Iraq for oil? THOSE authorities?

Let’s do the time warp again.

Anyway…

A senior Democratic aide briefed on the meeting disputed McConnell’s characterization of Obama’s remarks. “Whether intentionally or not, Senator McConnell’s comments mischaracterize the tone and the substance of the meeting. The President was very clear that he would keep Congress in the loop.”

Similar to Obama’s most transparent administration ever? Yeah.

****
From the “Almost the Most Useless Information Ever” Depatrment…

Americans sleep twice as much as they work, on average.

Averages mean NOTHING. Nothing.

If only one person in ten makes a million dollars and the rest make none at all then the average earnings are $100,000. It is a worthless statement.

From the article it is numbers pulled from ages 15 and up. The kids sleep more, work less. The adults work more, sleep less in general. But everybody sleeps some. Not everybody works. It is a totally bullshit pile of stupid.

Read Full Post »

Sea to shining sea.

The hearse with the extension ladder in front of us braked heavily, sending up a cloud of dust in the gravel road.

Nice opening sentence, huh?

Cruel Wife stomped her brakes soon after a breath whistled between my passenger-seat-driver teeth. I have never been comfortable when to driving in spite of asking her to drive roughly two-thirds of the time.

“Hey, there is a clown on the back of that hearse. An evil clown.”

“Yeah, I saw it,” she replied. “I mentioned that already.”

“Sure makes a statement when you own a hearse with an extension ladder, huh? Not sure what it says though.”

More whistles and sharp intakes of breath filled the car as people crossed the road in a dizzying flurry of cheap LED lights and glow-in-the-dark rings. This time she braked in a sharp rebuke to my neck, a nonverbal cue that I should be quiet and let her drive.

I respected her wishes for a count of five and then said “Gosh, that was quite a fireworks show for a small county like [name_censored]. It was huge. And the music they played… Patriotic American music, all of it good, except maybe Bruce Springsteen. ‘Born in the USA’, ok, yeah I get it, but he’s a huge liberal and then, too, was twerker-butt whatserface I think you said. With that choice of songs, I tell you what… the people of [name_censored] County did not elect Obama.”

“No, no they didn’t,” said Cruel Wife, grinding her molars even flatter. She is no fan of the man.

Not wanting her to drive angry for a second time tonight (the first of which I will tell you of tomorrow) I changed the topic. Driving angry with Cruel Wife is a lot like being on a decaying out of control carnival ride when the operator has just died from one too many Elephant ears.

“You know, there are people who fear clowns.” I could not remember the latin and missed a great chance to dazzle my children once more with my brilliance. Coulrophobia is the term, but remembering it ten minutes later impresses no one.

“Oh yeah?

“Sure. The Butcher of Lansing hates clowns, and at work The Dread Queen’s husband is terrified of them. She wouldn’t even take my evil clown mask home to torture him. It is crippling.”

My daughter seemed vulnerable to some teasing so I informed the kids that Killer Klowns from Outer Space is one of my favorite movies. I said “So what happens in the movie is…”

Lemurita yelled “Nooooo! Don’t say it!”

As I hoped she had taken my bait, swallowing the lure completely and setting the hook. “Since you ask, what happens is that evil space clow…”

“NOOOOOO!” she screamed shrilly. “I don’t want to hear it!”

To Cruel Wife I said “I am so evil.”

“Yes.”

HackerBoy had been pretty quiet and I heard him say in his soft voice “What happens in the movie?” Over his sister’s loud ‘la-la-la-la’ with her fingers in her ears I explained to him the incredible depth and nuances of the movie, a feat that took all of a minute with time left over to add, “It is a cool and funny movie.” I am not sure he was convinced.

I can only hope that some day we can enjoy Bubba Ho-Tep and John Dies at the End together.

“Hey, is that a hand sticking out of the bumper?”

“I said that already,” sighed Cruel Wife resignedly.

Thirty minutes before we had been waiting for the start of the [name_censored] County Family Laser Light and Fireworks Show. It finally cranked up with one of the better performances of the National Anthem that I have ever heard. My legs had fallen asleep so I had to settle for hat off and hand over my heart while sitting on the ground. It is perhaps a lapse in my parenting that I had to remind my kids to sit up and put their hands over their hearts, but they did it, so I am not displeased.

The lasers fired up and I realized that they were aimed out over the crowd and they were perhaps outside of my comfort zone in intensity. I work with lasers every single day and some of them (most) are high power lasers so I felt justified in my concern. I could do little else besides tell them to not stare at the sources where the scatter was brightest and look elsewhere. If Murphy and his damn law showed up and blinded everyone I wasn’t going to leave us with no one to drive home. We could go into MPE and laser eye safety, and debate the actual damage in this situation, but I like my vision.

The lasers did not last long and soon we heard song after patriotic song.

The fireworks themselves were awesome. Flat out the best I have seen, and I never expected that good of a show at [name_censored] County Family Laser Light and Fireworks Show. The bursts went on nonstop for a very long time, did a finale, and then a rib-cage-squeezing and ear-ringing encore.

I knew I was being played, with the music selection and show biz aspect of things, but I remembered with some feeling that I was damn glad to be an American and was actually moved by they whole thing. For some reason it just seemed to me that in our area, the prevailing crowd’s attitude tonight was one of “We needed this.”

Pretty amazing for a cynic like me. But it made me determined that those of us who do love our country need to get it back from the “bipartisan” slimebags in our government who think this next election will leave them untouched. Immigration Reform is not the future of America.

I sat there on the blanket on a mosquito-less cool summer night with my arm around HackerBoy and Lemurita snuggled close to steal what heat she could, and was thankful for it.

Seemed like it was a pretty good lead-in to Father’s Day.

Read Full Post »

So I am a Wrangler owner.

Strange thing being a Cult of the Wrangler member (de facto).  I have other Jeep Wrangler owners waving to me.  Now, I knew rationally and factually that this does exist but I have experienced it, which is a different thing.

In the last eight days I have had or fifteen Wrangler owners wave at me.  Two today.

I am really liking the darned thing.  Yes, it will kill me if I do not exercise control and daydreaming is not encouraged.  Ok, I can deal with that. It is like riding a horse that is a real spirited d*ckhead of a horse.

But I love it.

****

I always wondered what it might be like to be adrift, and always wondered how you ensure your survival. Well, you don’t. 99 times out of a hundred, I guess you die.

The Life of Pi would seem to be a bit rosy if anything.

****

Again, thanks to Cracked.com, now I have a better understanding of post-apocalypse.

****

Good heavens… What keeps them on? Glue?

My guess is the condom is mostly effective because the users would develop an aversion to genital pain.

****

Let us all thank a hacker today for moon footage.

****

Yes, evil walks the world.

Baby killers.. You do not experiment on the innocent. You try things out on a case by case basis to save a life, but not like this.

Read Full Post »

Cycles.

 

Our Grand Cherokee died, more or less, so we got a Wrangler (pre-owned by long margin).  Cruel Wife gets her car back and I get a jeep back.  I am tickled.  It drives like a jeep, it rides like a jeep, and it is noisy.  The short wheel base will murder you if you don’t respect it.  And I love it.

****

Well.  I am probably busier than any other time in my career at this moment.  It is kind of a crushing load felt by everyone in my company (and our families).  So I come home and don’t want to blog.

But here we are, hmmm?

A constitutional law guy does nothing and then gets elected to be president based on no demonstrable merit whatsoever.  Then, after years of trailblazing goat-paths through mediocrity, somehow manages to blame the system, saying it is broken.  And in his complaints, he manages to twist reality so badly it almost tears the fabric of space and time.

President Obama is taking a swipe at the Founding Fathers, blaming his inability to move his agenda on the “disadvantage” of having each state represented equally in the Senate.

Yeah, that is pretty effed up, all right.  Screwed up by the very senate you own… Tragic.

At a Democratic fundraiser in Chicago Thursday night, Mr. Obama told a small group of wealthy supporters that there are several hurdles to keeping Democrats in control of the Senate and recapturing the House. One of those problems, he said, is the apportionment of two Senate seats to each state regardless of population.

If I need to explain the ways in which that is wrong you probably wandered over here by mistake, but I wanted to point the situation out.

“Obviously, the nature of the Senate means that California has the same number of Senate seats as Wyoming. That puts us at a disadvantage,” Mr. Obama said.

He is missing the point.  That was the intent.

Here is the part where his logic is like a bag of cats, and you can smell crazy all over it.

“So there are some structural reasons why, despite the fact that Republican ideas are largely rejected by the public, it’s still hard for us to break through,” Mr. Obama said.

There isn’t a lick of logic there.

****

Should women get paid leave for menstrual cramps?  Boy that sure is a litmus issue for this election year, isn’t it?

****

I notice that the flaw “hubris” hasn’t changed much.  Especially in weather modeling.

What is so entertaining is that they can claim that previous statements could be called wrong no matter how vocal and strident they were before (but wrong) and this time claim certainty that they are incontestably right.  On Themageddon…

“There’s no serious dispute any more about whether the globe is warming, whether humans are responsible, and whether we will see large and dangerous changes in the future – in the words of the National Academy of Sciences – which we didn’t know in the 1970s,” said Michael Mann, a climatologist at Pennsylvania State University in University Park. He added that nearly every U.S. scientific society has assessed the evidence and come to the same conclusion.

His stance in Chillageddon in the 70′s?

“Meteorologists disagree about the cause and extent of the cooling trend, as well as over its specific impact on local weather conditions. But they are almost unanimous in their view that the trend will reduce agricultural productivity for the rest of the century.”

Yeah, but this time the hysteria is based on fact, right?

They don’t even have the grace to be ashamed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Read Full Post »

Multiple levels of crazy.

 

Been working on this post for days but so very distracted.  Sorry for dated material.

Kitty litter blamed for nuclear issues.  Were they using stuff that wasn’t fresh?  Our cats’ litter box is pretty rank.

****

See, I just get nasty headaches from not beating the crap out of idiots like this.  Marry your own pr0n-laden computer?

If gays have the right to “marry their object of sexual desire, even if they lack corresponding sexual parts, then I should have the right to marry my preferred sexual object”, he said.

Marry your hand, you ass.  Tell your mom you married Miss Michigan.

Unfortunately for Mr Sevier, the courts in Florida and Utah, found his legal arguments unpersuasive.

Unfortunately for taxpayers, frivolous suits are not hit with a hefty penalty.  He just wasted a lot of time when no one should have given him 3 minutes of their time.

 ****

I don’t know the source but it was sent to me.  It fills a niche in the uncanny valley.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

****

We apparently need to address the problem of why black and Hispanic men are less successful.

The “My Brother’s Keeper” initiative aims to address that.

What?  I know lots of blacks and Hispanics who worked hard and are pretty darned successful.  How is this measured?  What percentage is not successful and how do we know they are not?  What is the percentage of not successful whites?  Are the metrics the same?

The following is especially interesting because of the “suggested answers”.  They are asking participants their opinions and suggesting answers.  That is comedy gold when it isn’t just sad.

On jobs, Duncan plans to ask participants the biggest reason why these young men are “less successful in the job market than other young people.” Suggested answers are insufficient education or skills, inadequate connections or networking, or employer stereotypes.

The biggest reason?  I suppose the first pair of answers is best, education and skills.  Those two are the strongest correlations (and causation) regardless of any other factors.  Networking and connections?  Is that code speech for white privilege?  I think it is.  Employer stereotypes is definitely code for racism.

On the issue of criminal justice, Duncan will ask what cause “interactions by boys and young men of color with the juvenille/criminal justice system.” Suggested answers here include exposure to violence, a lack of positive influences, and biased law enforcement.

The first two seem highly likely but the third while some of it is likely some also results from the first two.

And on education, Duncan will ask how to improve education, and suggests the need for a more engaging curriculum, improved teacher quality, early access to college-level work, and increased collaboration between schools, families and communities.

What does “more engaging curriculum” mean?  Less boring?  Gosh, that would be swell.  But sorry, some shit is boring, so suck it up.  The rest of it is an awesome suggestion.  

Duncan will also ask how to improve the graduation rate, and proposes more financial aid, lower college costs, and better guidance when applying to college as possible answers. It also proposes shorter pathways to a high wage career, and a culturally relevant educational environment as other possible answers.

 More financial aid.  Ok, if given to everyone.  Lower college costs.  Ok, if applied across the board.  But who pays for that?  Better guidance?  Is the guidance they have now crappy guidance?  Why?  Did the start with their “B” game?  Why?

What does “shorter pathways to a high wage career” mean?  So less work is required for success?  You get success by not doing the same amount of work than others?  Culturally relevant means what, exactly?  This is code for “we need more black/Hispanic culture in our education because white culture is keeping the black and Hispanic man down.”

 

Read Full Post »

Ok, it has been in the news

NBA commissioner Adam Silver announced Tuesday that an NBA investigation concluded that the racist remarks made on a recording obtained by TMZ were made by Los Angeles Clippers owner Donald Sterling.

Silver banned Sterling for life from any association from the Clippers organization or the NBA. He is not allowed to attend any games or practice, or be involved in any business relating to the running of the team. Sterling is also fined $2.5 million dollars, the maximum amount allowed by the NBA.

If you know me, you know guys like Sterling churn my stomach.  His ilk are ignorant sons of bitches and if he was hit by a bus I would shed no tears.

But.. 

As ignorant and distasteful of a human being as he is, what did he do that was illegal?

He is entitled to his thoughts regardless of how crappy they are.  If the only response to his stupidity can only ever be punitive action then why are we not making laws against speech and thoughts?

Said Commisioner Silver:

Silver spoke to the press at an 11 a.m. news conference from New York, stating he will “do everything in my power” to force the sale of the Clippers.

“The hateful opinions voiced by that man are those of Mr. Sterling. The views expressed by Mr. Sterling are deeply offensive and harmful. That they came from an NBA owner only heightens the damage and my personal outrage,” Silver said. “I am banning Mr. Sterling for life from any association with the Clippers association or the NBA. Mr. Sterling may not attend any NBA games or practices, he may not be present at any Clippers facility, and he may not participate in any business or decisions involving the team.”

Oh hell yes, the remarks were offensive.  Hateful?  Maybe.

Harmful?  Who was harmed?

harm (härm)
n.
1. Physical or psychological injury or damage.
2. Wrong; evil.
tr.v. harmed, harm·ing, harms
To do harm to.
[Middle English, from Old English hearm.]

 Again…

Definition of harm (n)
Bing Dictionary
harm[ haarm ]
damage or injury: physical, mental, or moral impairment or deterioration
injure somebody or something: to cause physical, mental, or moral impairment or deterioration

 Who was harmed?

The team also released the following statement and have planned a 5:45 p.m. news conference prior to Tuesday’s sold-out game: “We wholeheartedly support and embrace the decision by the NBA and Commissioner Adam Silver today. Now the healing process begins.”

More than a dozen sponsors have dropped their support of the Clippers, including RedBull, CarMax and State Farm, as a result of the scandal.

“I can understand how upset they are, and I hope I can do everything under my power to bring them back into the NBA family,” Silver said.

Harm would be if people boycotted the Clippers as some hotheads have suggested.  It wouldn’t harm Sterling in the least.  It would harm the many people whose livelihoods depended upon the team, the stadium, and products…hot dog vendors, janitors, ticket-takers, etc.

“Whether or not these remarks were initially shared in private, they are now public and they represent his views,” Silver added.

His views.  His views are not illegal.  What IS illegal is the taping made of him by his mistress, the very taping everyone is using to crucify the turd.  But being a turd is not illegal.

“The healing process begins.”  Really?  People were so damaged by this ass that they have lifelong scars?  Really?

Let us look at what was said, to get a full view.

Silver said a forensic expert confirmed an audio recording taken by Sterling’s mistress, V. Stiviano, was not altered. In the clip, which was released by TMZ on Saturday, Sterling tells Stiviano, who is of African-American and Mexican descent, not to broadcast her association with “black people” at Clipper’s games. The audio clip was released shortly after she posted a picture of herself with Lakers Hall of Famer Magic Johnson on Instagram, which has since been removed.

Moving on.

Don’t get me wrong.  If the guy disappears tomorrow, I don’t care.

I am troubled, however, that so many people screamed for blood over something said, and that an illegal recording was completely ignored.  It is the chilling willingness of people to not defend speech, regardless of its stupidity and distasteful nature.  That troubles me.

****

This brings a happy smile to my face.  Recognition where it is due.

****

Obama, in his simultaneous grasp and inability to recognize the obvious.

“When ignorant folks want to advertise their ignorance, you don’t really have to do anything, you just let them talk,” Obama said.

Here is a good example of non-Obama ignorance.  I was going to snip out the non-dumb parts but there were none.

PORTLAND Ore. (Reuters) – A sample of albacore tuna caught off the shores of Oregon and Washington state have small levels of radioactivity from the 2011 Fukushima nuclear disaster in Japan, researchers said on Tuesday.

But authors of the Oregon State University study say the levels are so small you would have to consume more than 700,000 pounds of the fish with the highest radioactive level to match the amount of radiation the average person is annually exposed to in everyday life through cosmic rays, the air, the ground, X-rays and other sources.

Still, the findings shed some light about the impact of the meltdown on the Pacific Ocean following the March 2011 tsunami and subsequent power plant disaster, said Delvan Neville, a graduate research assistant at OSU and lead author of the study.

“I think people would rather have an answer on what is there and what isn’t there than have a big question mark,” Neville said.

At the most extreme, radiation levels tripled from fish tested before Fuskushima and fish tested after. That level was 0.1 percent of the level set by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration for concern.

“The levels were way too small to really be a food safety issue, but we still want to tell people about it so they know what’s there.” Neville said.

 I recall predicting this in an older post.

Read Full Post »

I can’t resist this one because CW says I have to blog it.

A Zonkey.

Zonkey. Of course it is.

Yes.

OK.  So Minecraft.  A life size 1:1 scale of the St. Louis Arch.  Life size.

I give you… St. Lemur’s Arch.

St. Lemur’s Arch.


Under the arch.  Lava lights it up at night.

That was built to the real arch.  I started with the equations for a catenary arch and built a table for elevation, displacement, centroid at each 1m interval.  Took about a week to make sure I translated it all correctly to MC analogue units.  It is 190-ish units high (base elevation 63) and 192 wide at the legs.  The triangular cross section is 14 wide at the base and 6 wide at the top.

The server-master did challenge us to build something that could be seen from space…

Took about 2 days.  Survival mode.  Zero deaths.  More cobblestone than I can count.

They say insanity and creativity suck face.  Well, I say that, anyway.

H/t to The Dude…

Paint job, awesome.

Another blackly humorous one… Wrap your normal garbage like this.

How to make garbage day more interesting.

 

 Why?   Beats the hell out of me.  I like Aliens.

Ok. Whatever.

 

 

 

Read Full Post »

Something.

I have to give Michelle Obama some credit for deciding to forego crashing the party of the graduating senior class.

Do you know how she could have scored a huge win, even from me?

If she had said, herself, in her own words, “Hey, you guys were right.  It would not be fair to the graduates who deserve their recognition on their day, and I hadn’t thought about it.  So please accept my apology and let’s see what other arrangements can be made.”

That would have been classy.  It would have won respect.  God knows I have none for her or her husband, but that would have given me something.

But no. Being classy enough to honor others humbly is not something he Obamas are known for worldwide.

Abbey Rubottom, 18, said the change of plans would work best for graduates and their families, as well as other community members who are interested in what Mrs. Obama would have the say about the anniversary of the Brown decision.

This is the real question I have… What can she possibly have to say about this important day that no one has said over and over?  Does anyone pretend to not know with high odds of being correct all the same utterances, statements, and admonitions about how the job isn’t done yet?

Will the white Hispanic come up?  Will Holder come up?  Will her husband’s personal struggles come up?  

I think the civil rights movement was absolutely one of the best things to happen in a great long time.  I don’t think the opportunities have been capitalized on, however.  I think a lot of potential has been utterly wasted, and racism doesn’t even come close to explaining it all.  Not even close.

Which makes it all the sadder than if it were racism alone.

Where is that very real dialogue we have been needing to have?

Because we need to be having a real dialogue if idiots like that rancher are asking if cotton-picking had merit.  Asshole.

But let’s have the real dialogue, not the one-way crap.

****

 Remember my lack of respect?  What a small amount of respect he showed his itamae.  Eating only half of your sushi?  Just order a cheeseburger you ball-less wonder.

Both men emerged from the restaurant to declare the meal had been a success, with Obama telling a crowd of journalists and well-wishers: “That’s some good sushi right there” and Abe saying they had discussed “a wide range of topics in a relaxed atmosphere”.

Seriously?  “That’s some good sushi right there”?

That is like going to a biker bar and saying the beer has a nice bouquet.  

 

Ok, that is enough for now.  My attitude sucks tonight.

 

Wait… It sucks a little less.

It would not help me, but I am thrilled about the implications for those who an implant would work.

Growing auditory nerves is… Damned awesome.

Ok, it sucks a lot less.

 

 

 

 

Read Full Post »

Take Two.

 
As Mitchell noted in his post over as Center of the Anomaly, I have been absent.

While I had a norovirus thing a few weeks ago, Cruel Wife saw fit to share with me her answer to the Job Cold.

It started out with a kind of a cough that seemed benign enough and quickly led to three lung-shredding coughing-up-broken glass days. It was excruciating, like no cold I have ever had.

I went to work a half day Wedneday and full days the rest off the week.  That was sheer willpower as I was exhausted from coughing and wheezing through my days and laboring through my breath and all through the night.  By Friday and Saturday/Sunday I was coughing hard enough to barf into wastebaskets.  I hurt all over.

Friday and Saturday I had a 2 degree fever and a vicious heache to go with it.  Not one night in all of this resulted in a decent night’s sleep.  Always sheet-soaked clammy sweat broken sleep-that-is-not-sleep.

Still, I hate docs and avoided them.

Monday morning I was showering for work (pure willpower) when I noticed I was coughing up pink and bloody phlegm.

So after a trip to the doc I seem to have won a lot of antibiotics, a huge string of prednisone, and roughly 1500mls of cherry flavored ultra-tussin, which is the first thing to give me a break in coughing in 11 days.  You can believe me when I say I had tears of gratitude and relief just to have the cough taken away.

So I will either get better or just not give a shite about not getting better.

The Butcher of Lansing, who will deny that he cares if anyone asks, has threatened with collecting on a slap bet if I go in tomorrow.

I wouldn’t pay heed but Melly Cat has glued herself to me as I have gotten worse.  She is my Nurse Cat.  This is endearing and ensures she will be the last critter we eat in the upcoming apocalypse.  She naps with me and turns her belly up because I love scratching her.

It is the fact that she has hung out with me that convinced me that Things Are Not Well.

Nursecat Melody

Read Full Post »

Older Posts »

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 31 other followers