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Archive for the ‘Geek’ Category

Correlation can imply causation now and then.

It should be noted that if one does a linear regression on a graph of frequency of divorce vs. frequency of graphing things in marriage, the correlation coefficient is r = 0.87, where 5 graphs per day in a relationship leads, ultimately, to a messy divorce involving multiple lawyers, blunt character assassinations, and the sacrificing of many small animals.  I am declining to post the graph in order to maximize my odds of that never happening.

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We just got back from seeing a matinee showing of The Hobbit, Lemurita and I.  It was fun.  She only jumped and said “Ew” twice, once when she spilled Orange Crush on herself.

Lemurita and I both felt that the giant eagles totally Roc’ed.

Hackerboy and Cruel Wife stayed at home and played Lego Harry Potter.

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h/t to The Dude for passing on this pic of the day.

forever

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Warning:  RANT AHEAD

This has been in my “to-do” box for some time.  It’s a mention of how life has been… unfair… to Gen Y’ers.  See, apparently someone along the way promised them puppies, unicorns, moonbeams, Hope and Charge, and all of the perks to be found at Big Rock Candy Mountain.

American Dream Fades for Generation Y Professionals

Eighteen months and two busted jobs later, the daughter of a retired physician and a former editor at Vogue circled back to upstate New York and hunkered down at a small legal office that pays about one-quarter of her former $165,000 salary.

Hey, life is hard.  I was laid off a day after our honeymoon ended, eight months later moved across country away from family and friends, and found/took a job making peanuts after losing most everything we had.  If she was making $165,ooo a year, why the hell doesn’t she have a huge savings account stuffed with dough?

Generation Y professionals entering the workforce are finding careers that once were gateways to high pay and upwardly mobile lives turning into detours and dead ends. Average incomes for individuals ages 25 to 34 have fallen 8 percent, double the adult population’s total drop, since the recession began in December 2007. Their unemployment rate remains stuck one-half to 1 percentage point above the national figure.

So, life gives you some hard knocks and just years later the conclusion is that the American Dream has faded?

Geez, grow some… brains.  Wherever did the American Dream promise success?

“This generation will be permanently depressed and will be on a lower path of income for probably all of their life — and at least the next 10 years,” says Rutgers professor Cliff Zukin, a senior research fellow at the university’s John J. Heldrich Center for Workforce Development. Professionals who start out in jobs other than their first choice tend to stay on the alternative path, earning less than they would have otherwise while becoming less likely to start over again later in preferred fields, Zukin says.

Guess what?  The world is populated by people who to a huge extent have lives that weren’t their first choice.

“I had a lot of faith in the system, the mythology that if you work really hard you can achieve anything, and the stock market always goes up,” says 2009 law school graduate Elizabeth Hallock, 33. “It was pretty naïve on my part.”

Yes, yes it was.

“It’s a generation that had really high expectations, in some part driven by the way they were raised by their boomer parents,” she says. “Yet in the past five years they have had reality slammed in their face by the employment situation.”

The legacy given by boomer parents has been comprised mostly of piss-poor assessment of reality.

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Mathematics are boundless

Steamboat McGoo approached me the other day and said “Lemur King, I would love to collaborate on a paper, but I must be top billing and I get to name the misshapen progeny that will result from such a union.

Wanting to flex some brainicles a bit I agreed to his proposal and we worked feverishly on this document that we hope to publish in the Albanian Mathematical Society of Our Lady of Perpetual Menses.  Their peer review cycle is generally only as long as it takes to clear a $40 check and requires no edits.  Beware, McGoo’s mind is a deep one and his papers should not be taken lightly – I was lucky to be able to include my name.  The link will bring you the PDF document (compiled in LaTeX)

McGoo-Lemur King-2012

ADIABATIC INFLATIONARY THEORY OF
MAMMO-GROUPS IN THE PRESENCE OF TACTILE
MANIPULATION: AN EXCITATIONAL TENSOR
APPROACH

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Kittens grow fast.  Ours quickly becomes a demon.  Here you see a small kitten in the coat rack, which she has recently decided is a suitable cat-perch.   She is in Urban Kitten mode, where she blends passably well into her surroundings.

treedcat

Below is Melody Demon Song taking a breather and planning out her next ambush on Sir Jack L. Katt and Mdm. Jilly of Boo.CatNotofThisEarth

Here she is looking a tad bit less demonic and just skilled at whatever she is doing.

MelodyTreeNormal

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T-Shirts.

Last t-shirt was the Pug shirt.  A new one has come from co-worker Inscrutable Half-Breed‘s wife who shall not be named since she’s too nice to mix up in this sordid blog.

Her suggestion of this shirt as the uniform for engineers is beautiful.  She is very wise.  (tautism alert)  It isn’t cheap, but truly valuable things rarely are.

I liked this one, too.  I’m not sure if it means I’m geeky or just plain sad.

Risqué, for this blog… but maybe veeshir will finally come back.  Not sure if it is really a shirt or not but there is a hint of realism right there in front of you.

Oh, I promised the dog-faced baby image, didn’t I?

That *is* tragic, isn’t it?

Yes, I was able to remove this cat from my chair without a hint of guilt.  Not even a shred.

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You know that moment when you realize that someone actually came up for a name for something you kinda always sort of new all your life but never thought about it much?  As in “Gosh, I sure wish I knew where SYNDROME_X came from…” or perhaps, “Gee, SYNDROME_Y is sure kicking my butt today.”

It’s that moment when you scream at the top of your lungs “Eurethra!  I’ve got it!”

Now, clear your mind for a moment, and then read on.  I will throw the name at you momentarily.  When you read it, stop for a moment for some internal reflection and then tell me if you knew instinctively what it was BEFORE reading the description.

Ready?  Ok, here goes…

Piss shiver.

Yes, you read that right.  Now stop and think… think, damn your eyes… There, good, you actually thought for a second, didn’t you?

Did you know what it was?

It seems more guys are familiar with it but when your bladder finally voids after some interval that is less than pleasant there is a quasi-orgasmic shiver that seems to be some sort of reward.  I can’t explain it.  You either know it or need to go read up on it.

Don’t be ashamed, ladies.  Cruel Wife didn’t know what it was and wondered “Is it a guy thing?”

Here’s some definitions and mentions of it – both places are high-quality persons-of-breeding repositories of knowledge.

The Straight Dope’s take on piss shiver

Cracked.com has #4 dedicated to piss shiver

Everyone is probably going to say they’ve been calling them by name for years and I will feel inadequate because it took me reading The Straight Dope in order to even recognize that there was this void in my life where I didn’t have the words to put to a normal part of life.  I feel so inadequate.

But, moving on, Cecil over at the Straight Dope also answered another question, one that has been burning me for years.  Are Manatees white or dark meat?

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Update:  Fixing Your Hernia, the Man’s Way.  This guy has guts.

It is absolutely impossible for someone to fix their own hernia.  - Sam Carvajal, a surgeon at Glendale Adventist Medical Center

Might have saved some pain and suffering if the guy had checked that little fact out ahead of time.

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Real men don’t use BBQ’s… they use the wheel from their car… the one that a woman ruined for him at just 1092 miles (ten days old) by pulling out in front of him without even looking.

Yes, the real man will use an aluminum rim from a 2003 Nissan Maxima.

They pack that sucker with a few bricks, throw in some play-sand from the kid’s sandbox, dump a buttload of natural wood charcoal (not briquettes), wedge in a peanut-oil-soaked paper towel to light the whole mess, and walk away.  They just don’t sit there and play with their wood when there’s meat to be beat.

Stealing one’s wife’s hairdryer works wonders once the meat has been seen to.  The blowing job gets the charcoal hot enough to shoe a horse.  Granted, we’re here to eat cow, but damn tootin’ you could do some serious work with that fire.  But the work we’re here to do is cook some cow, because we’re meatitarians, dammit.  That meat pic will get larger if you stroke click it.

That cow gets 2-1/2 minutes per side while immersed in the infero of Hades (center pic).   The meat is thrown DIRECTLY on the charcoal.  Be a man, flick it off if you don’t like it.  It’s not gonna bite ya, that little piece of carbon sitting there smoldering at 3000F.

Note:  Actually, it might bite you.  I flicked it with my index finger.  I hooked my finger and did a stabbing down motion to get the charcoal off of the meat.   It allowed me to scrape red hot coals under my fingernail where it resulted in a burn that lasted for hours.  This stuff is really hot folks, don’t just play with it.

If you like extra char, just run that hairdryer right in the middle of the pile of coals and believe me, things will happen.  Blow jobs always make things happen.

I will tell you this:  If you eat it my way as a guest and you tell me that you really would rather have salt and pepper on it, I will give it to you but I will never respect you.  That meat was sublime without a thing added to it.

And the next day, slapped between pieces of bread is a religious experience.  But hey what do I know?

I’ll make more comments on it more tomorrow when I’m awake.

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Update below…

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One burglar killed the other in critical as homeowner protects his home.  Guess it’s not a good idea to steal guns from a gun-loving family.

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I have a dilemma.

Should I get Duke Nukem Forever for $55 or the Duke Nukem Forever: Balls of Steel Edition for $99?     I mean you get a giant bust of Duke,  playing cards, dice, postcards, a collector’s item artbook, casino chips, and oh yes, the game, too.  Look it up on Amazon.  You’ll see.

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Look carefully at this picture and see if you notice anything unusual about it.  You may have to click to embiggenify it.

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Touch Your Inner Geek

Passed on by alert reader mrmacs, a handy guide to beautiful dance moves.  I’m fond of x2+y2, myself.http://www.neatorama.com/2011/04/07/mathematical-dance-moves/

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