Police: Woman Tried to Assault Cop With Sex Toy
Headlines like this always promise a story that, face it, will be a bit… odd.
Police say a dine-and-dash turned into assault charges for an Illinois woman who allegedly walked out on her bill at a restaurant and then attempted to strike a cop with a “clear, rigid feminine pleasure device,” according to police reports obtained by AOL News.
Wow. That’s never good. Little disappointed by AOL’s coverage of this story – nowhere do they get into her motivation, her feelings, and what she expected to be the outcome resulting from her actions. I want to know this lady better (not in the carnal sense – I have standards).
A responding officer scoured the area and spotted a woman matching the perp’s description lying on a plot of grass near the Six Flags Great America amusement park.
When informed that she must either pay the bill or face arrest, Bildsten allegedly told the officer that she wasn’t carrying any money but had cash at home.
[At her home] Bildsten “said her money was in her dresser drawer and she opened it and reached inside and removed a ‘clear, rigid feminine pleasure device’ and held it over her head and approached the officer in a threatening manner,” according to a statement issued by the Gurnee Police Department.
Few things are as utterly terrifying as having a large caliber dildo brandished at you from overhead. Ignore it at your peril… it’s like the Schlong of Damocles or something like that.
“The officer knocked the device out of the way prior to being struck and placed the woman under arrest,” the statement continued.
Let’s be honest, there are a lot of things that could have been much worse, but do the cops ever envision these moments when they make their career choice?
Bildsten was charged with theft of labor for allegedly walking out on the restaurant bill, pedestrian under the influence for walking on city streets while inebriated, and aggravated assault for menacing the officer with a sex toy.
Perhaps she’ll get off with good behavior.
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If enough people say “That’s a risk we’re willing to take” then they do indeed need to get rid of the scanners. Gov’t does not call the shots, as much as they’d like to believe.
I find that being full-body groped ( I was in Florida ) to be ridiculous since I don’t even remotely fit a terrorist profile, and I don’t like the all-body scanner. Target those that fit the profile and stop being a bunch of pinheads. Be discerning.
Lemur King's Folly 
Schlong of Damocles??
Bwaahahahahahahahahahaha!
I hear ya about the inspections at airports. I think they’re total bullshit. In fact, I’m gonna have to post something about some of my experiences with airport security sometime this week. There are two incidents that stand out in my mind, and one of them almost resulted in my inflicting grievous bodily harm on a little bastard in uniform suffering from extreme little man syndrome at the airport in Los Angeles.
I think people should take a solid month and refuse to use the airlines, period, nationwide for that thirty days. In addition, everyone should call/write/email the airlines and let them know that they are not using their services because of TSA and their bullshit inspections.
It will take a whole lot less than 30 days to get the airline’s attention. Even a percent or two drop that can be correlated to the draconian measures put forth by Napolitano and her cadre of security weasels will be enough to send the airline PAC’s screaming onto the Hill en masse.
Bunch of muslims getting pissed for being singled out because of “profiling”? Fine, then change into a group that acts as one to actually become moderate peace-loving Islamists and kick the holy ever-loving shit out of the people in your midst who thinks blowing up innocents is such a good idea. When a society as a whole has had enough of some bullshit behavior [pick any offensive intolerable behavior such as goat-raping or necrophilia] they’ll do something. But they haven’t and won’t.
Give you an example – there’s this group of yahoos from Nebraska or wherever that like to protest at the funerals of our military fallen. It’s disgraceful. The ONLY reason they are getting away with it is because some judges think it is their right to do so. If it were up to 99% of us, we’d have them tarred, feathered, set on fire, and pushed out a third-story window. But no one and I mean no one, besides the creeps in question, that given the choice to spit on ’em or give them the time of day, couldn’t work up a bit of saliva to put things in perspective.
Yet you don’t see that in the muslim world. You hear bitching about being singled out, you hear cheers when a westerner dies, or you hear silence so profound it is deafening.
Yeah, ok, there’s probably some exceptions, but I’m not seeing them.
I’m in a mood. Neck hurts and I’m pissy.
The group you’re referring to that protests military funerals is Reverend Phelps and his congregation. They’re out of Topeka, Kansas, sadly. That’s about an hour away from where I live.
Believe me, there are many many kansans that would love to burn that bastard’s place to the ground and introduce the good reverend to the business end of a baseball bat.
That’s the group, all right.
“…‘clear, rigid feminine pleasure device”
So the cop was assaulted with a diamond ring or brooch?
A big one by the sounds of it, too, McGoo.
Cop #1: “Wow, I was
whackedstimulated with a four-carat diamond brooch today, guys!”Cops #2-17: “Duuuuuude… you’re lucky to be up and moving around.”
What I want to know is why we can’t take the lead from Israel and start treating airline security like they do. They don’t do the scanners or the groping, yet they haven’t had a major air issue despite being ahead of even the US on terrorists’ want lists.
Probably because the Israelis aren’t real big fans of bullshit. They just plain don’t have time for it.