Mix-n-Match Dat.
December 21, 2011 by Lemur King
I suppose one could say that since it is consensual then it is ok but I still find this to be one small step away from inc3st, b3astiality, and dwarf pr0n in terms of repulsive behavior.
Dutch broadcaster to air cannibalism.
****
Aw hell, folks, it’s Grab Ass Tuesday. Technically it is Wednesday as I post this, but I don’t give a rat’s patootie.
Here’s a joke to warm your heart. I am told by Cruel Wife that if I ever do this I’m dead meat.
A couple was shopping at the mall on Christmas Eve, and the place was packed. Walking through the crowded mall the wife suddenly looks up and notices her husband is no where in sight. They have so much to do in such a short amount of time, that this really pisses her off. She grabs her cellphone to call him and ask him where the hell he is.
The husband answers in a calm voice says, “Honey, remember the jewelry store we went into 5 years ago where you fell in love with that diamond necklace but we were so broke that we could not afford it, and I told you not to worry, that one day I’d be able to buy it for you?”
She is so touched she begins to cry…”Yes-I remember that jewelry store.”
He said, “Well I’m in the bar right next to it.”
****
Sent to me by a friend of my Dad’s – Salty Nutter – don’t know where he got it.
Yeah, I shot jerky out my nose when I saw it, too.
****
My kitty, Jilly-Boo/Jill/Jillbert (pick one), has been as cute as a kitty can be since I got home from the hospital. I think she realizes that life is fleeting and moments are precious, that relationships are what really matter. It’s scritches that make the world purr, dammit. Pictures get bigger if you click on them.
Jilly-Kitty in Occupy Lemur’s Drawers
Jilly-Boo looking very Cougar-like in Occupy Lemur’s Spare Bedding Foam
Lemur King’s healing neck. Yes, it hurt. Yes, I’m pasty-white.
The neck pic… bottom middle is where they hacked out part of my sternum to use in my neck fusion. A faint “V” to the left of it 2-1/2″ and up 1-1/2″ (“V” pointing to 10 o’clock) is where the drain tube was. The dark line is where they hacked in using something very similar to Aggie Sith’s Zombie-Killing Machete.
Swallowing is still a chore. Hurts still but when medicated the hurt is less than what I experienced all day every day prior to the surgery. I’ve got no complaints.
I even have more strength back. Before, when I tried to open a bag of tortillas I did not have enough strength in my thumbs and forefingers to open the ziploc bag and ended up cutting the zip-tops off of every bag I came across. Cruel Wife thought I was being an ass but I figured better to let her think I was an ass than to worry her with things like that.
Like this:
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What I’m hearing is that – cautiously, we don’t want to jump to conclusions – the operation just might have been a smashing success! And you’ll have an interesting scar & tale you can dine out on for a long time!
My heart soars like a hawk!
You know, McGoo, I had a realization this morning. When LK went in for this procedure, I’d hoped that it would lessen his pain but I did not have any real hope that it alter the future course of our lives. In seeing how well he’s progressing, my heart not only soars like a hawk, it is doing dips and dives, swoops and song like a happy little wren in springtime. This may be my best Christmas ever.
Wow. That good, huh?
As long as I stop doing stupid things like this morning, trying to show someone how much better my range of motion is and causing a charlie-fox of a neurological incident in the process.
Just hurts now, so I’m going to go lie down.
I’m thinking of having a post with that picture titled “Name that Scar”.
People compete to find the best line for a bullsh*t session.
Like:
You should see the other guy.
or…
They cut me. They cut me deep in a dark alley and left me to die.
or…
Freak cuisinart accident… REAL freak.
Better yet, you could claim that you got the scar late one evening in the office. Your boss turned into a werewolf, and you killed him by tossing him from the office skyscraper window.
Tell me if you’ve heard this story before. If not, you’ve got some ‘splainin’ and readin’ to do…
I haven’t read Monster Hunters, sorry. It’s on my list and I should be able to get to it sometime in 2016… I like the whole idea of squashing the boss with a couch but the werewolf part sounds like it’s a lot of work.
Fie on you for not having read any of the Monster Hunter books. Imagine, if you will, an extremely large truck mounted (Oshkosh) snow blower, and a field full of zombies.
How a freak blender accident, while filming an episode of “Will it Blend”?
CW – I honest-to-god had an added portion to my last sentence and then deleted it. I said
“I’m betting that next Spring and Summer are going to be wonderful times for the whole fambly.”
By that I meant just what you say – many many things could change – and for the better!
LK – I’ll send in a photo of my lilly-white ass with my hip surgery scar showing on one buttock.
Then…the internet will cease to exist out of intergalactic disgust.
Excellent news then!
My hub had similar thoughts when he had first & second arm surgeries – still hurts, still tingles, still aches, yeah. Worlds better than the previous pain? Oh yes.
Hope things continue to improve and you and the family spend a great Christmas together!
Oh hell yes, it is an improvement.
If only this aging body would heal a bit faster… (whinge whinge whine whine)
LK, you are SOOOOO lucky to have CW, family, friends, and doctor to help you through this drawn-out crisis. You really deserve a nice Christmas Holiday. And New Year, and future…
I am so happy to hear you are doing so much better, LK!!
Now, quit being a dweeb and let your body heal before you pull some boneheaded move again.
Otherwise, you’ll have another scar… 😉
And bruises from CW for having messed himself up…
I’m so antsy to be able to do things. Couple that with boredom and the desire to get out from under the narco-fog and you have a recipe for a guy who is slowly going nuts.