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Archive for March 17th, 2013

Apologies for the harsh tone here. I was in a foul mood. I posted, pulled the posting, posted it again after thinking about it some more. I figure everybody has a bad day. Perhaps the title was more appropriate than I thought.


There is a despicable cowardly attempt to blackmail Red Bull™ into paying the low-lifes with money or the low-lifes contend that they will contaminate energy drinks with fecal matter.

Hey, I was ok with those silly Norks, and the Chinese growing pains, and Hamas’ psychotic-neuroses and trying to project their gender-confusion issues on everyone else, and the Iranian penis-envy phase that they’ve been going through for several thousand years, and all of the UN and EU pretty much hating the US for actually being effective… I say screw ’em all.

But we’re talking about messing with my energy drink, man. I don’t need it, but I like to drink it socially and there is no reason why my supply should be threatened. I can quit anytime, I just don’t want to. We just need to send in some heavy bombers in to lay waste to the capital city of whatever country the slimebags are in. Then the rest of the country will have incentive to round up and execute these heathen who are threatening our Red Bull™ supply.

Easy-peasy.

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I have a few simple rules: 1) No passing gas at my dinner table – it’s extremely poor manners. 2. If a room full of English speakers suddenly has two people switch to another language I ask them to switch back to English, and if not, leave. Privacy can be found elsewhere. 3. No use of the N-word or the C-word. If I hear a guy use the C-word towards my wife he will only be allowed medical care after he has wiped his butt with broken fingers while passing the broken teeth I made him pick up and eat with those same broken fingers.† 4. Do not put me on call waiting. I will hang up. Call me when you want to talk to me and aren’t going to waste my time. 5. Don’t hurt children. See #3 for consequences but be warned, they are just the beginning. 6. Don’t be a gargoyle. If you go cyborg/gargoyle and start listening in on me and tracking my life I won’t hurt you but your equipment will stop working. 7. Saying “Yuk” or “Gross” at a food at the dinner table gets you a second helping. 8. Don’t be suprised that I heard the phone ring when you called during our dinner and I didn’t pick it up anyway. It was our dinnertime.

† When CW and I were dating a friend of mine made the mistake of making a disparaging remark towards her when she was at my place and it got maximally real instantly. No fingers were broken, no teeth were eaten or passed, other than the visions of it happening in my head.

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Stories like this make me feel warm and fuzzy to a greater degree than a spring day. A jerk gets a fist to the face for being a Class A Butt-wipe.

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Hey, I really like it when a mom is so excited about her kid’s school assembly that she wants to get right down there and… WHAT? Oh… NO… DON’T DO THAT! Ohpleaseohpleaseohpleaseohplease. OW OW OW OW! You like that, lady?!? I just gouged out my eyes with a broken spork covered with rat feces because you couldn’t keep your clothes on. But oh, the poor children. We adults can drink ourselves to death to get away from the memories. But kids are going to need a whole lotta psychotherapy and the damage is permanent and eternal.

They say school staff told them the assembly was halted and the cafeteria cleared after Meaders began dancing onstage and took off some of her clothes.

She’s charged with seven counts of endangering the welfare of a child and one count of public lewdness.

Pre-K through 8th Grade…AYDREA-MEADERS

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