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Archive for September, 2013

Regurgitation of barf.

You’ve probably seen it. If you have, good. If not, enjoy.

h/t to The Butcher of Lansing.

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I have been sitting on this one for some time. I just needed another reason to stay out of Florida.

Herpes infected simians would do it.

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Whatever other opinions you may have about the French, some of their scientists rock.
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It may be scary, it may be cool, but it is sciencey-mathey-neat. Pictures from blurred video.

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The heat was on.

A few days ago I was talking to The Brains at work, a couple of cool PhD’s in Things That Involve Math. One is a good friend and the other happens to be the VP at my company.

Suddenly Prime Number says to Hot Pants (the VP’s name as a result of this very story) “Hey, show Lemur the pic of your neighbor’s kid!”

Hot Pants whips out his smartphone and shows me where the kid had all manner of burns around his mouth and head. He ate a Bhut Jolokia pepper at school, got fried, and then rubbed it all around his face and head, unaware that the stuff burns skin, too. Then the kid went home for the afternoon.

I told Hot Pants that the ghost pepper is pretty damned hot and not to be screwed around with. Jokingly I said that I had some and I would bring them in if he wanted. He said absolutely.

For rough reference… Habanero is a quarter million Scoville. Red Savina is half a mil. Jolokia is a cool one mil. Roughly.

Yesterday I brought them in and taped them to my doorframe with a post-it note that said “Hot Pants… This is your destiny. – LK”

Around lunchtime he came in and there was a gathering of five of us to watch, with Rectified Diode being the most excited. He was really looking forward to watching it.

HP took a bite and I started describing to him what he was about to experience as he munched.

“Ok, it should start out with a nice smoky flavor.”

“Yeah, it is smoky… Nice.”

“Ok, now it should start to build slowly in heat but there are some other nice flavors there.”

“Yeah.”

“Ok, now it should pick up speed…”

“Yup.”

“Ok, now it is going to feel like you drank battery acid.”

(Dawning expression) “Yeah, that describes it pretty well.”

He gave a pained expression and was flushing red.

“Ok, now it will continue to get worse for the next 30 minutes. A lot worse.”

Then I took a picture of him holding up the bag, in pain.

He deliberately made a point of taking additional bites. See, when I ate one, I ate all I was going to eat in one go. He had rabid wolves eating him and he was egging them on.

So I sent out an email to a large number of people to give credit where it was due, with pics.

Subject: Mr. Vice President, Sir.

The man is tough. Continued to finish off the pepper even as it was attacking him. He dominated that pepper. Had I eaten the one I did in stages I doubt I could have kept chomping on it.

You have my respect, Hot Pants.

We should probably get some “fire eaters” shirts.

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Note: I do not give out compliments lightly, so this was a highly unusual email for me to be sending.

Later, Prime Number, HP, and I met with a customer. Old Man (our president) attended.

When it was over, Old Man looked directly at me and said “Stop trying to kill my employees.”

Apparently Hot Pants had spent an hour curled up on the floor of the locked men’s room in agony.

He still has my respect. I think I even felt a bit of guilt but it passed quickly and I at first mistook it for gas.

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Let’s just do this already.

[Warning… Moderately peeved alert.]

A large number of people are calling for another year before pulling the trigger on Obamacare.

Congress has decided it is just too rich for their blood and have had such an attack of conscience about how much better OC is for them that they have waived it for themselves and their staffers. Apparently the guilt over the huge increase in benefits they would be given by ObamaCare just keeps them up at nights.

The savings passed on to businesses has many unions and businesses (such as McDonald’s) suffering so much anxiety about the huge surge in their profits that they are begging to be cut from the program.

Indeed, the government has managed to trim so much cost out that the original cost increase to a family of four will go from the $7500 above current rates to returning $2500 to the average family, below current rates.

So why are we waiting on this totally awesome hunk of law? It can only help, right?

Yeah, this will be fair.

Think “long waiting” when you think “need to see the doctor” – also think “sharing the avoidable deaths progressively”

This won’t kill my family financially but it would put us on the edge. I would become… vexed.

Right now I am thinking of the grotesquely fat guy in Monty Python’s “The Meaning of Life”. Obamacare is the necessary explosion of the pigs at the trough.

Seriously, given how hard this is going to crater I want the voting public to decide just how “independent” they really are by election time. Let’s just do this thing. If we are going to do a non-negotiable radical Brazilian using a few gallons of wax paste on our privates let us just get it over with instead of lots of little tugs.

I have suggested in the past but I suspect there is some truth here… The truest power one has over something is if one can destroy it and is willing to do so. I wonder if it will be necessary for conservatives to threaten their party leaders with mass defection, going so far as to vote for the other side to burn out root and branch. There may be no other way to remove the offensive vermin in power, because by far the most offensive ones are the ones who cannot stand on principles because they have none. At least the liberals have not turned coats, because they proudly displayed their colors all along.

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Yeah. I am in a mood.

Alert reader The Dude passed on to me this pic of an awesome guard dog.

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Good enough to see twice.

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Chilies get dangerous.

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You know this to be true.

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What is this?

Yeah, it is soy sauce. We cannot find it anymore. Help us find a source or we will surely die. Please. 20130922-145400.jpg   That is seriously all the energy I have to post – positioning a soy sauce bottle so I could snap a shot of the label.  More later, I think.

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