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Archive for January, 2014

Buyer’s Remorse.

My opinion can be summed up like this…

If you have any complaints about Obamacare you must declare who you voted for in the last two elections. If you say “Obama” at any time, you must then apologize, saying “I was wrong.”

And then sit down.

Why? Because I am beyond tired of people who sit there with wounded puppy expressions of betrayal as they realize that warnings from people who knew Obamacare was bad medicine were absolutely on the mark.

I am not saying the people linked above voted Obama but several of them have the expression of surprise, like they just could not see this coming.

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Yes, you’re a broken toy if this fails to make you smile.

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How do you know when it is not your time? When you survive an industrial woodchipper.

Arce’s injuries are severe, and he is expected to remain in the hospital for at least the next few weeks. Arce sustained a broken pelvis, seven broken ribs, a shattered ankle, bruised liver, broken leg, a collapsed lung and a deep cut that runs the entire length of the back of his body. The cut was so deep it crushed his knee, and he remains on a heavy dose of pain medication at the hospital.

He remained conscious throughout the ten-second shredding.

The guy said the worst part wasn’t the injury, it was not knowing what would happen. Been there and I buy that.

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Golly, this explains a lot. Science has proven short people are paranoid.

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No, I don’t see how this could have a downside. Automatic-release bras. It is all good, right?

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Well, if we are not going to declare race when describing suspects for crimes, then sex cannot be used, nor car type, nor weapons used.

Because us white male T-bird owners who lawfully own shotguns get tired of hearing about white male bank robbers driving T-birds who wield shotguns – it makes us feel unsafe and untrusted.

And men are always being singled out in rape reports and wife beatings, how is that for unfair? Men everywhere… The repeated male, male, male suspect… It really discomforts men because they feel like suspicions begin to increase.

How loud and sustained was the black outcry over the term “white Hispanic”? I forget.

And actually they do increase, those suspicions. I have had women refuse to say hello or look up on the street, mothers shield their kids, and nervous glances because I was male. And it is understandable – I don’t even trust men with my wife or daughter’s safety unless I really know them… 99.99% of rapists are male (please do not cite me the stats on male victims of female rapists, I am not even remotely interested).

Tell you what… How’s about we start seeing more guys stepping up and beating the everlovin’ piss out of the guys who are committing the crimes rather than piss and moan about something that isn’t going to change because it should not have to? Declare the race and gender of every suspect and be done with it. In case everyone forgot, the goal is to catch the bastards or beaches who did the crime, not dither over hurt feelings.

Seriously, is this such a problem? I have zero problems with turning a beaten-bloody rapist over to the police and saying “He must’ve slipped on a bar of soap” and descriptions of a white male holding up the gas station around the corner don’t affect me in the least. It just is what it is.

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Crazy Cat Lady sent me this.

She had the gall to make jokes, like “Guess it was bring-your-own (bbq) sauce event”.

When a semi truck overturns and becomes an inferno, burning alive 76,000 lbs of beef ribs, I call that a tragedy. It is just plain cold to make jokes about the fiery death of ribs.

Note in comments below… hilljohnny says he has reason to believe the load of ribs quoted might be a load of BS. I hope so, since this is a tragedy otherwise.

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Tonight is Obama’s State of the Union address.

I could watch it but I was thinking I would get out the random orbital sander and grind my eyes out, instead. It was a serious toss-up.

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Another tragedy today was the loss of one of the Sith’s most beloved… Her crock pot.

Be kind to her – the weather has dropped below freezing in Deepest Darkest Texas, and that makes the loss of a crock a terrible thing. I mock her on some things but rarely if ever about food. Food is serious stuff.

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Call me ignorant, but handing out free crack pipes to combat AIDS sounds a lot like running a lawn mower in the bed of your pickup to improve your truck’s fuel economy.

“It may seem counter-intuitive, but it’s a great program. Once you can get people into your program, make them feel respected, taken care of them, they’re more likely to want to come back and want to get on HIV meds,” Thomas said.

Yeah, nothing would make me feel more respected than being manipulated by my addiction.
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New evidence says that spanking kids may turn them intolawbreakers.

Older evidence says that not spanking kids results in an asshole.

I will take my chances.

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Nothing says avant garde quite like throwing a few vaginas into your artwork.

Ten dollars says Cruel Wife knows exactly the phrase going through my head (in disgust) and the expression on my face. It is the one I like to call “Withering Scorn”.

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Vainglorious.

Short post as it is a migraine day.

I looked over and saw the cat, Mel, about six inches from the fridge looking at her reflection. Black cat, black fridge.

I imagine she was sitting there thinking “Damn, do I look good in black, or what?”

It is -5F and dropping fast outside. Going to work in the morning looks to be brutal at -15F. I think my biggest complaint this winter is the idiots on the road. A driver nearly made a statistic of himself under a gas truck right in front of me last week. It was his fault but I doubt he learned a thing.

Found this on pitsnipesgripes. Warning, it is NSFW, that site. It is a great site but visit on your own time for the funny stuff. It is tucked between lots of “art” (aka “smut”, but who am I to judge?).

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Now… THIS one, I also found at PSG, and I will only comment to say a few things:

1) Warning… It is pretty “out there”
2) I can never see muppets the same way again
3) It is really really NSFW
4) My sister is scarred for life after viewing it, and I did not think it possible to shock her
5) I warned you

This is the tame sampler.

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If that doesn’t deter you, then… Click on the period.

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My boss, the one who ate the Jolokia (aka Hot Pants) sent a few of us at work this video and asked us if we could somehow incorporate it into our instruments.

I am all for the effort.

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Oh thank God, they invented glow in the dark kittens. I was worried.

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( Thanks, Cracked.com … http://www.cracked.com/article_20829_5-amazing-magical-powers-created-by-simple-science_p2.html )

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h/t to Cruel Wife for finding a Steampunk Melody.

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Note: I would never arm my kitten in real life.

Note #2: I have no recollection of where she found this.

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h/t to Inscrutable Half-Breed for his find on carving a solid block of wood into a box of money.

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Read all about this insanity here.

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h/t to The Dude for one of the coldest blackest comics I have seen this week.

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Hijinks on Mars

The rover I posted about last night has found an anomaly. It found a stone where none should have been.

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I think someone is playing tricks on it. The equivalent of the fake lotto ticket joke. But maybe, just maybe it is more sordid and it is some Martian who just wants one thing… To engage in sweet, sweet mathematics with it.

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Well, nevermind. Take a look at what explosions of flavor look like.

Seems like a lot of money wasted in ruining perfectly beautiful spices.

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Q: Why did the 9mph chicken cross the road?

A: To get hit by the 130mph Porsche.

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Heard this one years ago and I think there is truth here.

“Your friends will know you better in the first minute you meet than your acquaintances will know you in a thousand years.”

Richard Bach

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Everybody loves a pug. Or should.

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Nothing like being a media whore in the science spotlight. I can see it, but selfies is borderline presidential.

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Only in America (Oregon, specifically) can it take a court to grant us RIGHTS WE ALREADY HAD.

GRANTS PASS, Ore. (AP) — A federal appeals court ruled Friday that bloggers and the public have the same First Amendment protections as journalists when sued for defamation: If the issue is of public concern, plaintiffs have to prove negligence to win damages.

Yeah, it is a federal appeals court, but face it, Oregon is still a massive train wreck.

They studied Obama well, though… Let the website people be the whipping boy.

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Hey, have a cute pic of rats with teddy bears. Courtesy of Angry French Woman.

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Snowden has less life expectancy than a bunch of bananas.

When spy guys are openly saying they want to stick a toxic shiv into you so you die later at home while they gloat, you are in trouble.

I am torn because while he ultimately did everyone a favor I don’t approve of traitors.

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Hahahahahahahahahah. Hah. The quotes from this guy belong on a demon’s resume.

While the president recognized the surveillance program has grown in recent years, he also strongly defended those who work in the intelligence community, saying they do not abuse power. “After all,” he said, “the folks at NSA and other intelligence agencies are our neighbors and our friends.”

“Those who defend these programs are not dismissive of civil liberties,” Obama said.

http://www.nationaljournal.com/white-house/obama-nsa-reforms-should-give-americans-greater-confidence-20140117

Oh yeah, NSA: We luvs you guys. Keep up the good work, neighbors.

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What is that? You want to re-watch the latest narcissistic media whore crying because she feels burned by Obama?

Somehow “I told you so” just don’t cover it.

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This Face Slimmer thing I saw on World’s Dumbest Inventions… Probably the best chance you will ever have to look like a blow up doll.

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No, I did not see it, either.

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Et tu, broccoli?
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Passed on by The Dude… Note the FaceTome watermark – I have seen enough funny stuff originate from there, you might wander by and check it out.

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That is all for now. Everybody panic.

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Rest easy, Sam.

Well, hell. I liked this kid’s attitude towards life. Rest in peace, Sam.

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