Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Posts Tagged ‘disco’

Yowch.

All right people, a PSA from Dr. Lemur…

Discography, Discogram:  (DIS-coh-gram) n.  A procedure whereby a huge large-diameter needle is inserted clear through the neck of a strapped-down person in order to inflate discs between vertebrae on the opposite side of the neck in an attempt to reproduce or make worse the patient’s symptoms, performed without sedative so as to ensure accurate results.  Extremely effective at confirming bad discs when it works, meaning that the pain levels can be very intense.

Interviewer:  So, Dr. Lemur, you say you have heard anecdotal evidence suggesting that the procedure is no picnic, and just yesterday experienced it for yourself.

Dr. Lemur:  It should be noted that the following day is no picnic, either.

Interviewer:  Can you shed any light on the nature of the sensation when they inflate the damaged discs?

Dr. Lemur:  Certainly.  Close your eyes, take a deep breath… now visualize slamming your penis in an electrified sliding glass door frame.  Mentally transport your screaming genitals and place them in the appropriate location along your spine and you’re reasonably close to the reality.

Interviewer:  But.. but… I don’t have male genitalia…

Dr. Lemur:  I don’t have breasts but evidence suggests that visualizing a particularly nasty titty-twist followed by a mammography procedure that uses a searing-hot electrified x-ray apparatus would be sufficient.  As before, mentally transport your screaming boob to the appropriate location along your spine.

Dr. Lemur:  Do you have any other questions?  You have turned a rather pale shade of green…

Interviewer:  No.  No, that’s all for now.  Thank you, Dr. Lemur.

Perhaps that was a bit of embellishment.  Today is pretty uncomfortable all the same.

****
XKCD never fails to make me laugh, however.

Proof of Zermelo's well-ordering theorem given the Axiom of Choice: 1: Take S to be any set. 2: When I reach step three, if S hasn't managed to find a well-ordering relation for itself, I'll feed it into this wood chipper. 3: Hey, look, S is well-ordered.

****

Update:  As Aggie Sith noted in comment #1, this next segment has been found to be a steaming load of hoaxy bullsh*t.

Hell may not have fury like that of a woman scorned, but don’t be so quick to discount the guys, either.

Cheated lover tats back.

I wonder if anyone has picked up on the wry humor of it all, that they’ve merely proven that they were made for each other.

Read Full Post »