Posts Tagged ‘flames’

Yes, I am still sick.  I don’t think I’ve ever had every joint ache this bad before.  Sleep is crappy and you end up drenched in sweat.

Cruel Wife is on the mend.


Bill Mahr said:

If you’re thinking about voting for Mitt Romney, I would like to make this one plea: black people know who you are and they will come after you.”

Let us be perfectly clear:

I do not care who you areif you think you are going to threaten me with violence in order to get me to vote the way you want, I encourage you to test your theory.  Try, just try, to endanger me or mine for voting in whatever way I see fit.  I will not threaten violence except in defense of myself and my family and I promise that you will have cause to reflect upon the wisdom of your choice if you try to harm anyone under my roof.  And in that, I am completely color blind – threats to my family will be dealt with regardless of who you are or what you look like.

Under no circumstances will I riot if Romney loses.  That’s the difference between me and those threatening violence and riots if Obama does not win.

So there, Bill.  “Plea” or threaten all you like, this is one vote that won’t be swayed by threats.

One tweeter said:

F R A N K L I N @ChangeMy_Name

If Mitt Romney wins, nighas gon riot like when Dr. King died. It’s gon be a sight to see.

Wait a minute here… MLK died after championing a world where color blindness is a virtue, and the loss of a Presidential election for a black guy and a win by a white guy is cause for riots?

The double-standard here is astounding.

Oh, by the way… any bets on how many days New York and New Jersey delay the election?  Just think how many votes can be fudged in ten to twenty days.

Halloween pics, as promised.   Pics may or may not embiggenify.

The obligatory cannibal pumpkins.

Flaming pumpkins through the liberal application of 1/2 gallon of kerosene.

Flaming green pumpkins through chemistry.

Pumpkins using road flares.  Who knew that pumpkins were so flammable?  I actually did have to caution kids “Do NOT look directly at the pumpkin!!!”

Halloween needs the obligatory black cat…

She has “Data” eyes.  Kinda spooky.  She also steals my chair all the time.  As do the other two cats and Lemurita and Hacker-Boy.

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veeshir spoke yesterday of Groucho’s Paradox – never join a club that would allow you to join.

But what of the other masters along with Groucho – what did they have to say?   Einstein, Shakespeare, Chopin, Jagger, Groucho, House, and Wilde.  Science, literature, music, philosophy, philosophy, philosophy, and philosophy.

No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it.
Albert Einstein  (The Idiot’s Folly Fallacy)

The evil that men do lives after them; the good is oft interred with their bones.
William Shakespeare   (The Omnipresent Evil Axiom)
Simplicity is the final achievement. After one has played a vast quantity of notes and more notes, it is simplicity that emerges as the crowning reward of art.
Frederic Chopin    (The Keep It Simple Stupid Principle)
You can’t always get what you want.
Mick Jagger   (The You Can’t Always Get What You Want Rule)
Alimony is like buying hay for a dead horse.
Groucho Marx   (The Life Ain’t Fair Postulate)
Everybody lies.
House   (The No Truth in Advertising Axiom)
Woman begins by resisting a man’s advances and ends by blocking his retreat.
Oscar Wilde    (The Venus Flytrap Conundrum)
I will have Halloween pics but I’m ill with the every-joint-aches kind of cold that gives you a runner’s high from simply getting out of bed or going to the bathroom.  For now, be happy with the pic that ID10T Killer sent me:
Here at LK House, we did cannibal pumpkins (Cruel Wife’s specialty) and a Flamin’ Pumpkin – four foot flames from a pumpkin for two hours which was later re-purposed to be Road-Flare Pumpkin.
Top costumes of the night?  One of the cutest Lil’ Bugs I’ve ever seen toddled up to get some candy and I saw a Weeping Angel – she grinned like a mad fool when I recognized what she was.
I hit a deer last night.  I was going about 50, saw this damnfool critter make his break for it, and I laid on the brakes almost but not quite hard enough to lock them up.  Had I not done so he would have connected with the Jeep at the dead-center point, perhaps a bit to my side of center.  As it was he demolished the headlight cavity (gone, just gone), cracked clean through the bumper, sprung the quarter-panel, and possibly bent the hood up slightly in the middle.
Killed the deer immediately, thankfully – it did not suffer.  It was a solid hit – the kind of hit where you see a skateboarder skate into the side of a brick building and there is no doubt, absolutely none, that an insane amount of kinetic energy has been transferred from one body to another and the biological body lost.  Took a while to find the mid-sized forked horn off in the deep grass where he landed.
Everything in the Jeep piled up against the dash and against the backs of the front seats, so between the brakes and the deer it was a heck of a deceleration.  I waited for the police dude to get there on the off chance that the bill will come to more than $1000 to fix it.
As I mentioned, Halloween night I came down with a cold thing but worked a ten hour day yesterday so by the time I hit the deer I had zero interest in harvesting a few steaks from it.
By the way, if you are white you are going to Hell.  Just thought you might like to know that.
The [Rev. Joseph Lowery] and civil rights advocate who gave the benediction at President Obama’s inauguration suggested at a recent Obama re-election rally that he thinks white people are going to hell — though he later said it was just a joke.
Now, you readers out there know I hate the N-word – I hate it with a passion – so know that when I use it below I am using it to illustrate my point.
How many niggers does it take to shingle a roof?  One if you slice him thin enough.
Why use that “joke”?  Because I once heard a guy tell it to me as if it were funny.  I was horrified.  But he said it was “just a joke”.
Just like with that guy, I call Lowery a f*cking racist.  I don’t care how you want to dress it up, you can’t paint racism as a joke.  Lowry is not only racist but he’s the worst type – the kind that is blatantly racist and can’t be troubled to admit it – who then goes on as if nothing happened.

“I don’t know what kind of a n—– wouldn’t vote with a black man running,” he also told the audience in the St. James Baptist Church in Forsyth, Ga., according to the paper.

The 91-year-old Lowery, though, told an Atlanta-area TV station and the Daily Caller that the monologue was a joke and from the perspective of a young militant.

Lowery also said he made clear at the time that the comments — at the event reportedly attended by hundreds of African Americans — were intended as a joke.

What the hell is a “young militant” anyway?  Is this code-speak for “Oh, it’s ok that he’s a virulent bordering-on-terrorist because he’s been wronged by whitey”?
Lowery then finishes up in a most hypocritical fashion:
He closed with the following passage: “Lord, in the memory of all the saints who from their labors rest, and in the joy of a new beginning, we ask you to help us work for that day when black will not be asked to get in back, when brown can stick around, when yellow will be mellow, when the red man can get ahead, man — and when white will embrace what is right.”
Remember folks, that your POTUS hangs out with these kinds of virulent racists and terrorists (domestic and foreign), circumvents laws like a duck takes to water, and really can’t be bothered with protecting the US’s citizens and interests.
How is it that the election is so close then??

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SixMeatBuffet (Cranky) was kind enough to post some work of mine and as I thought about it, I figured I’d erect a flame-shield now rather than later. This graphic is my response to what Rush Limbaugh refers to as “FemiNazis”.  I’ve asked my wife, Cruel Wife, what she thinks of these individuals, and her answer led me to believe that this response is admissible.  The individuals that this is meant to irritate are generally those women who are so militantly Feminist (with a capital “F”) that they treat men displaying chivalrous qualities as dirt, often responding with harsh words and vitriol.

I can give you an example.  I once held a door for a woman who made it a point to tell me that she did not need a door held for her and that I was a jerk for assuming that she was not capable.   My FIRST response was to have her stand in a spot through which I could slam the door.  But, being brought up better than that, I did not.  I thought about it though.  So there.

So anyway, I’d seen a bumper sticker with those words:

So you’re a Feminist.  Isn’t that cute?

… and thought:  “Oh how obnoxious!”   But I felt that just the words by themselves didn’t go far enough, that perhaps something more could be done.  So with a little work and some input from Cruel Wife, I was able to put together a graphic that had her laughing hard and out loud. She suggested the little heart and the Pretty Pony.  I figured Hello Kitty™ was de rigueur but was looking for that something extra… almost but not quite the complete essence.  She really wanted me to put a Barbie Doll™ on it, too, but I felt that when shrunk down to banner/badge size on a website that too many of BD’s fine features would be lost. Cruel Wife is one of those women that believes that you can be a feminist without ceasing to be a woman. I don’t care.  As long as y’all stay at home and bake cookies, it’s fine with me.

Note: If the wife thought for one second that I meant that last line, I’d be dead… you hear me?  Dead. So don’t go gettin’ your panties in a wad because it was meant in jest.

Then again, Cruel Wife has a sense of humor beyond that of most broads.

When she was pregnant with our first child I would “moo” at her, and by the end of the pregnancy she would run into something and knock it over and go “Moooooooo” herself.  Sometime around that same time, she was lying on the bed taking a load off her lower back and I ran into the room, spritzed her with a spray bottle, and screamed “Keep her wet until we can get her back into the water!!!” And, you must note, I am still alive.  Again, if she thought for a second that I meant it in a mean way or wasn’t completely joking to lighten the mood, I’d be buried six feet under.  She is an pretty good shot with a .357 Mag.  Getting 5 of 6 shots in a 4″ circle at 50 feet good enough for me.


Ok, if you maddened half-crazed irritated and angry women have kept up with me so far and are still torqued, I’m posturing for dramatic comedic effect.  I am not a misanthrope.  I’m an a**hole but not a misanthrope.  I’ll throw you something to take your mind off of your anger.  Look at these awesome carved eggs

Geez, and you thought Mad Cow Disease meant bovines… not PMS or generally irritable females.

Note: Again, these are all things I joke about with my wife and she has not killed me yet.   So relax, eh?  I’m just in an ornery mood and having fun with it.  Remember, SHE READS MY BLOG.

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