Posts Tagged ‘Jilly-boo’


Our kitten broke free of her prison last night – it was a complex scheme she hatched in order to do so.  She “pushed the door open and walked out”.   Wild, huh?

I looked down and saw a bottle-brush tail and said “Oh hi, Melo… uh oh.”

I knew that she had either been discovered by Jack-Katt and Jilly-Boo or was soon to be discovered.  I had visions of little pieces of kitten lying all over the house and the older cats gnawing on soft little kitten bones while hacking up dainty little furballs.

No, instead the kitten decided to do a charging “YOU WANT A PIECE OF ME?  HUH?” maneuver repeatedly until the older cats backed down.  Below is a snapshot of her when Jack-Katt (who outweighs her by roughly 12 to 1) hissed at her.

You ate the last of the cookies?!! You BASTARD.  And WHERE ARE MY OTHER THREE BOOTS?

That little ball of fluff bluffed her way into the pecking order of the house and is totally at ease going wherever the hell she wants.  The big cats still hiss and are kind of put out but they’ve agreed to co-exist.  Jack-Katt even retreated enough to sit in a box and observe the kitten as she charged him.

Melody Song Boo Lemur (Lemur is not her real last name and the name with the addition of “Boo” sounds like socks on a chicken but the kids wanted it)

I do chalk it up to some stuff Cruel Wife found and that was confirmed as being effective by Crazy Cat Lady from work – it is a natural kitty pheremones Air Wick™ type of product.  You plug it in and it gives off HappyKitty pheremones.  It really seems to have calmed them all down.

I wonder how many cats they have to squeeze to get the quantity of pheremones contained in the bottle.  Oh well, if it promotes Good Feelings between the felines in my house I’m willing to sacrifice any number of other cats to obtain said pheremones.

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I’m so excited!  This fall I will finally get Cheesy Poofs and the bag will read “Cheesy Poofs” and not something like “Natural Cheetos”, which are indeed cheesy, poofy, and… well, they’re cheesy and poofy but gosh darn it they aren’t called that.  They need to be specifically called “Cheesy Poofs”.

Sadly, someone must risk actually entering Wal-Mart in order to buy them – most likely Cruel Wife – but it’s a risk and a sacrifice I’m willing to make.

Speaking of cheesy poofs, want to see the best picture of my kitty Wide Load Jilly-Boo?  She’s wide and a real load as you can see in the picture.  I’m surprised we don’t have to grease her up to get her through doorways.  She’s started to suck in small moons and asteroid-type objects.  She got her own zip code recently.  Half of Ethiopia could be fed for three weeks – off of one haunch.

Click on the pic to make Jilly bigger, as if you really need to.

I am her human.  She has laid claim to me and tries to stand on my chest every single night as I read before bed.  It wasn’t a problem until she hit 18 pounds or so.  In case you are wondering, yes that is an awful job I did of de-spookifying her eyes, which had the shiny cat eye thing going on so bad they were brighter than the noonday sun.

Here she is just after we brought in some of our industrial-strength catnip – fresh from the backyard.  From the way her head moved you’d have thought we tried to scare her with a nice mix of chlorine and bleach, but this was her “I’m so happy I wouldn’t care if you shot me at this very moment” body language, where she started to roll and growl.


Just a few minutes ago one or both of them jumped up onto the counter to score some weed (their catnip).  Cruel Wife came around the corner and found them sitting there and half comatose.

Note how Jilly-Boo is behind Jack-Cat and she still looks bigger.  He’s 13 pounds.  He’s no small cat.


Boy is it ever a good thing they got him off the bench – it allowed him to clean himself up and turn his life around.

Not really.  This guy is a living train wreck.  Judge —> pervert —> DUI —> inmate —> stalker —> pervert again —> DUI/possession.

Hey, he’s found his calling.  A lot of people never figure out what their niche is.

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Light Week.

It may be a light week (working in overdrive this week) but heavy is the new normal.

Specifically my cat, Jilly-boo.  I may be her human, too.  She’s bonded to me, which Cruel Wife thinks is just fine since she’s kind of  tired of clingy/needy things wanting more of her attention (presumably the two kids plus me makes three).

Anyway, I got home and was getting changed into my civilian clothes (read:  Not Almost-Monkey Suit) and I saw my cat looking funny and making even funnier noises.  She was so very interested in a chipmunk that she didn’t even notice I was there.  So I got a picture.

My nickname for her is “Wide Load” because her butt flat-out waddles back and forth but this almost looks petite because I chopped off her behind.    She’s actually a very loving kitty who sits on my chest right before lights out.  Stiletto-paws and all.

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Merry Catsmus.

Merry Christmas to all.

I’ll flesh this story out a bit more tomorrow but suffice it to say I walked into the pet store looking for one cat and came away with two.

They are Last Chance cats, meaning they’re destined for the Humane Society if they aren’t placed with a family.

Meet Jack and Jill, or as I call them, Jackal and Jilly-boo.  They are three years old and brother and sister.  We took both so they could be kept together – they are fantastic with each other.  Jack has been out and about all evening and you would have thought he was our cat for years the way he’s been with the commotion and kids.  He was calm, cool, and catlike.

I even crashed my helicopter next to him and he barely twitched.  (full-control chopper – yay for me)

Why, someone got a cat for Christmas under the tree... (Jack)

Jilly-boo is a bit more reserved.  She came out and really started scoping the place out after the kids went down.  Shown below is her as she’s scoping the upper back shelves in our closet.

Why, there's ANOTHER one in the closet... (Jilly-boo)

Me and Cruel Wife, we’re tickled to have critters running about and cats are autonomous enough that they’re fitting in very well.


Mitchell, the gift to Cruel Wife was totally freakin’ awesome.  A Girl Genius print, and a great one at that.  I tell you, that Agatha… rowr.   And it has coffee on it, too!    Thank you again for the leather satchel as well.   Yours is in-transit.

More about Christmas and our totally hedonistic materialist binge tomorrow.   I’ve been a miser for years now and this Christmas we’ve been able to splurge a little.  It’s been nice.



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