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Posts Tagged ‘love’

As an attention grabber, I have totally stolen something from Bunk Strutts.  A certain amount of shame was involved, yes.

It is sad.  But I’ve more or less come to terms with it and have moved on.

I like Pugs.  I really didn’t steal this for any other reason than that I like Pugs.

Full disclosure: And he obtained it from here… http://www.amyoops.com/2012/08/from-my-inbox.html#.UDQrhqBA2tY

No, it’s not a sick kind of “I like Pugs” thing, I just think they’re ugly enough to be cute and I haven’t seen many mean ones.

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Semi-alert reader ID10T Killer has sent me a second image that he says was flashed on his screen in a sidebar advertisement at Tom’s Hardware during his first visit on a totally virgin machine on it’s maiden voyage. (The first image can be found here.)

Now, this means one of the following:

  1. He’s either a lyin’ perv (which I’m not saying is a bad thing) and they’ve totally got his number  (odds of this are somewhere between 30% and 0.00001% but I ain’t telling because if I tell, he tells)
  2. Tom’s Hardware just figures 99% of their clientele consists of males who cannot find a real woman who will get (and stay) within 10 feet of him  (ID10T Killer is married, with kids)
  3. Tom’s Hardware is tracking people in ways we can’t believe
  4. Random sh*t happens all the time and even blind squirrels find nuts once in a while

If #2 didn’t make much sense, Tom’s Hardware is Geek Central.  Either accept that as gospel or go see for yourself.

Now, all that said, ID10T Killer and I have wondered…

“What in the hell is Wartun3, and are you going to be exposed to “t3nt@cl3 53x” or a major payload of nasty code just for being curious?”†

I doubt either of us is going to go check it out.  And we probably wouldn’t tell you if we did.

As Cruel Wife can attest, I have a thing for short cute brunettes with sometimes violent tendencies, so the graphic was at least interesting.

Apologies, because I am no fan of l33t-speak, but neither do I want web-crawling stuff sniffing me out for the term “t3nt@cl3 53x” so I threw in some pseudo-l33t.  Don’t even think about flaming me about my improper ‘spelling’ because I don’t even claim to know it all that well.

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And, this just in from the Bizarro Universe…

Study:  Marriage causes women to drink more than men

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And a hearty:

“THANK YOU, PAL!”

… to Aggie Sith and Cruel Wife.

Cruel Wife just visited Aggie’s site (Sithy Things) where she posted the recipe for a drink called “Witch’s Brew”.  She laughed at the drink and the name and I said “What’s so funny?”

“Oh, it’s Aggie post today” chirped Cruel Wife.

I thought hard.  “Wait, what was the post again?  Oh, the drink…”

“… Witches Brew,” she finished for me.

Cruel Wife read the ingredients list and said “‘Black sugar’ is an ingredient?  I’ve never heard of ‘black sugar’.”

Trying to be helpful because (a) I was pretty sure it wasn’t a common variant of heroin, and (b) I’m a food-lover and interested in all things food, I said “Hang on… I’ll look it up… okay… Bing-dot-com… b-l-a-c-k space s-u-g-a-r… waiting… waiting… oh, it’s some kind of Taiwanese variant of way darker brown sugar and…”

I stopped, stared, and then I finished with “… Goddammit, you better thank me for doing that search for you.”

Confused, Cruel Wife said “What, why should I tha… black sugar… oooooohhhh.  (insert ‘bwah-hah-hah-hah here)

One cannot un-ring the bell once it has been rung.  Dammit, I’ve been on the web 20 years and should have known better.  I’ve seen worse, I just don’t like being surprised by it.

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Circular Narcissism

Update:

Rock paper scissors lizard Spock.  Big Bang Theory, I thank you.  I never would have been geek enough to learn that one.

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Circular narcissism is the phrase for today.

Your government is in love with itself and The State willing, everyone will be following the recommendations of the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation, which funded the Rand Corporation to do an 18 month study on whether your eating establishments meet government guidelines.  It’s a pretty fair bet that the RWJF is left-leaning given how much money they give to NPR.  You don’t donate money to your ideological opposites.  Why can I safely say that the NPR is liberal?  Here’s why.  The circular narcissism will make you upchuck in your shorts.  (many thanks to Halfmanhalfamazing)   Hey, that reminds me – IS there any liberal media bias?

So what happens with stuff like RWJF/Rand publications?  Why, they get used to help guide policy.  That is, they get used to run your life for you.

Conclusions The paper provides a comprehensive view of chain restaurant menu nutrition prior to nationwide labelling laws. It offers baseline data to evaluate how restaurants respond after laws are implemented.

Narcissism.  I still haven’t linked that up circularly yet, have I?

People like Michelle Obama see where people (you the taxpayer) need to be taught the error of their ways.  Funding is given to those groups who share a desire to see their plans implemented.  Those groups do studies showing “proof” that their assertions are indeed correct.  Politicians use that information to further their goals and satisfy their pet agendas.  And it’s just a huge bunch of folks loving themselves for all their philanthropic works of fiction.

So let’s say one of your favorite restaurants doesn’t fit the standard.  What happens then?  Are they punished by the government?  Are they told to degrease and desist?  Are they shut down?  What if I want fatty flavorful food?  Do I get a say in this?  What if I like all the components of my McGangbang™ sandwich just the way they are?

For the sandwich, go here, and scroll down to “The McGangBang” – I show it here for your convenience, but there are many other foods for losers at that link… enjoy.

You take an ordinary McDouble off the dollar menu

 then you take an ordinary McChicken off the dollar menu

and you shove the McChicken inside the McDouble. Right in between the patties, just wedge that McChicken in there, so you have one tall super sandwich for just a few bucks. Get an order of fries because we all die in the end anyway.

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I think one could say that our president loves people loving him.  That’s why this picture, sent to me by The Dude has to be one of the best presidential mockeries I’ve seen this week – it is NSFW, people.  Stroke it gently with the mouse pointer and click and it will get bigger.

It’s no worse than what Time published last week, what with a breastfeeding toddler.

Far better to be tasteful like Nabisco in Korea – thank you Gawker.com for the article.

Nabisco, you ought to just fess up and admit that you thought boobies and cookies sounded great together.

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Shelter that Snowflake.

Update:   Sent to me by ID10T Killer.  I cannot possibly imagine how you could get geekier than building an ALU using MineCraft.   That doesn’t mean “bad”, it just means “you don’t get very many dates, do you?”

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Just how much of a sad sack of sh*t do you need to be to think that your kid needs a “no-hit pinata”
?

Me, I’m going to get my kids a harp-seal pinata, furred with real harp-seal fur.

This was originally over at Tacky Raccoons (Bunk Strutts).

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In a million years I could not stress enough how badly I need #5, The Walking Harvester, aka the Tree-Eating Robo-Spider

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Seanbaby over at Cracked.com put up a piece listing sex advice books… Page 2 is something else.  Definitely adult-oriented.  Funny as hell.

4 Great Sex Advice Books for People Who Hate Sex

#4 looks like a good way to die of a brain aneurysm, and I don’t mean the good kind.

7 Sex Tips from Cosmo That Will Put You in the Hospital

Ah, what the hell.  We’re on “Sex” tonight so let’s talk about “forbidden love”.
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And making paper out of elephant poop is a green thing to do… how?
…environmentally conscious company…
[snip]
After the poo is gathered, Flancman said it’s carefully rinsed with water, leaving only the fibrous materials from the grasses, bamboo and fruits the elephants have eaten but couldn’t digest.
Then… those fibers are thrown into a giant pot of boiling water to ensure an even more thorough cleansing and sterilization, leaving the fibers primed and ready to be made into paper.Once additional fibers from pineapple plants and trees are thrown into the all-natural mix to add thickness, [the] team separates the moist pulp into small cakes that are then spread over a mesh-bottomed tray and left out to dry naturally under the sun for several hours.Once dry, the cakes transform into sheets of paper, and Flancman and his crew are able to peel them off the tray and start making Poo Poo Paper products.

He said this tedious handmade process is repeated often, and in the end, the paper comes out sturdy and oatmeal-colored without a hint of stinkiness.

Oh!  They are allowed to dry naturally, which makes this a green process.  Right.  Got it.
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I made an awful, awful, awful mistake a month or so ago.  I like to cook and I made fresh mashed spuds using red potatoes.  My favorite, next to Yukon Golds.  So anyway, I slop some on my daughter’s plate, add a pat of butter, and a dollop of gravy from a pork roast on top.
Looking at Cruel Wife I said with a grin “There you go, girl, a ‘Volcano of Love’.”
More later…
Now, that didn’t sound NEARLY as obscene when I said it as when my daughter said tonight after finishing her mashed potatoes:
“Dad, I want another ‘Volcano of Love’.”
I looked at my wife, and she had the most evil grin on her face – the kind of evil grin that turns your bones gelatinous and makes your skin just wetly slough off and pile up on the floor.
I’m going to need a whole lot of serious therapy.

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Update:  Regarding the redistribution of your wealth…  Obama:  My Plan Will Spread the Wealth Around

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Oh I can feel the love…

McCain supporters march in Manhattan.

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Things to expect with an Obama victory.  Or even without it…  Michael Barone speaks regarding a liberal thugocracy.

“I need you to go out and talk to your friends and talk to your neighbors,” Barack Obama told a crowd in Elko, Nev. “I want you to talk to them whether they are independent or whether they are Republican. I want you to argue with them and get in their face.” Actually, Obama supporters are doing a lot more than getting into people’s faces. They seem determined to shut people up.

…later …

These attempts to shut down political speech have become routine for liberals. Congressional Democrats sought to reimpose the “fairness doctrine” on broadcasters, which until it was repealed in the 1980s required equal time for different points of view. The motive was plain: to shut down the one conservative-leaning communications medium, talk radio. Liberal talk-show hosts have mostly failed to draw audiences, and many liberals can’t abide having citizens hear contrary views.

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Speaking of liberal open-mindedness, take a look at what the EU is doing.  Limiting MP3 players to 100dB.

[EU spokeswoman Helen Kearns] said regulators would look next year at lowering the EU legal limit of 100 decibels for MP3 players.

Apple was forced to pull its iPod player from store shelves in France and upgrade software on the device to limit sound to 100 decibels.

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Note:  I managed to make a statement that was caught by Allen and I want to put it up front – the kind of individual who I had in mind when writing this was the individual who suddenly decides they are the conscientious objector type only when faced with being called up.  Allen is very right to point out that there are examples of genuine and honorable conscientious objectors and it should be recognized.

Obama is dizzying himself running around doing contortions while chasing his tail.

Women should register for Selective Service. But he does not approve of a draft.  He’s been taking lessons from the Great Prevaricator, WJC.

“And I think that if women are registered for service — not necessarily in combat roles, and I don’t agree with the draft — I think it will help to send a message to my two daughters that they’ve got obligations to this great country as well as boys do.”

How’s about we take a peek at “Selective Service”?  We’ll humor Wikipedia and pretend like it is factually trustworthy… in this case it is.

The Selective Service System is the means by which the United States administers military conscription. It entails registering all males between the ages of 18 and 25 with the system for the purpose of having information available about potential soldiers in the event of war.

The description on the Selective Service website (government):

The legislation under which this agency operates is the Military Selective Service Act. Under this law, the mission of the Selective Service System is twofold: to deliver untrained manpower to the armed forces in time of emergency in accordance with requirements established by the Department of Defense, and to administer the alternative service program for conscientious objectors.  It is in these instances that my “ought to have the balls” statement should not and cannot apply – Thanks Allen – LK

Huh.  So, Selective Service registration essentially has two purposes – one, to gather information for a draft. The second is for conscientious objectors who wish to live here and partake of the freedoms in this country but are too lily-livered to ever follow through with doing their duty if it required actual fighting or service.  (Yeah, I feel pretty strongly about this – if your neighbor is man enough to go if/when he is drafted – and possibly die in doing so – you ought to have the balls to do it, too.  THAT is why I honor and respect veterans – draftees or voluntary servicemen.)

Obama goes to say:

But he did say women should be expected to register with the Selective Service, comparing the role of women to black soldiers and airmen who served during World War II, when the armed forces were still segregated.

“There was a time when African-Americans weren’t allowed to serve in combat,” Mr. Obama said. “And yet, when they did, not only did they perform brilliantly, but what also happened is they helped to change America, and they helped to underscore that we’re equal.

In no way is there a correlation between blacks and women in combat.  NONE.

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