Sad beyond belief.

Crazy Cat Lady sent me this.

She had the gall to make jokes, like “Guess it was bring-your-own (bbq) sauce event”.

When a semi truck overturns and becomes an inferno, burning alive 76,000 lbs of beef ribs, I call that a tragedy. It is just plain cold to make jokes about the fiery death of ribs.

Note in comments below… hilljohnny says he has reason to believe the load of ribs quoted might be a load of BS. I hope so, since this is a tragedy otherwise.

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Tonight is Obama’s State of the Union address.

I could watch it but I was thinking I would get out the random orbital sander and grind my eyes out, instead. It was a serious toss-up.

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Another tragedy today was the loss of one of the Sith’s most beloved… Her crock pot.

Be kind to her – the weather has dropped below freezing in Deepest Darkest Texas, and that makes the loss of a crock a terrible thing. I mock her on some things but rarely if ever about food. Food is serious stuff.

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Call me ignorant, but handing out free crack pipes to combat AIDS sounds a lot like running a lawn mower in the bed of your pickup to improve your truck’s fuel economy.

“It may seem counter-intuitive, but it’s a great program. Once you can get people into your program, make them feel respected, taken care of them, they’re more likely to want to come back and want to get on HIV meds,” Thomas said.

Yeah, nothing would make me feel more respected than being manipulated by my addiction.
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New evidence says that spanking kids may turn them intolawbreakers.

Older evidence says that not spanking kids results in an asshole.

I will take my chances.

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Nothing says avant garde quite like throwing a few vaginas into your artwork.

Ten dollars says Cruel Wife knows exactly the phrase going through my head (in disgust) and the expression on my face. It is the one I like to call “Withering Scorn”.

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Insert Word Here.

Cruel Wife told Hacker-Boy that he needed to get ready for bed.

His scowl, closed fists, set jaw, and head lowered – it was man language – I felt a need to translate for CW.

I said (sotto voce):  “You bitch.”

She looked at me, shaking her head.

“You know that’s what he was thinking about you… he just didn’t have the words.”

Which gave us both a good hearty laugh because it’s true.

We’re not so old we don’t remember being kids ourselves.

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While we’re on that topic… right hand to God, this was my pre-pre-bedtime-story discussion with Lemurita…

She was complaining about how pizza is ruined.  She says “It tastes like garbage.  Miss Obama really messed up our pizza.”

Of course she is referring to Michelle O’s crusade to decide what is best for our children, as if we couldn’t decide.    And here.

I asked her “You do know why mom and I are conservative, right?” We’ll leave the concepts of conservative, libertarian, republicrats, liberal, commies (oops, already said liberal, didn’t I?), and the merits of each for when she’s older.

“What does that mean?”

“Well, for one thing – among many – it means that we believe that in this country we should have the right to choose what we do and don’t want to eat, that it isn’t up to our government to decide those things for us.  We tell them what to do, not the other way around.”

She said “Well, I think if people are brave enough, they should write to the government and tell them they want our food back.”

“I agree absolutely, Lemurita, with one teensy exception.  You know what that is?”

“No.  What?” she asked.

“I believe that we should never have to be brave to exercise our rights.  If you want to stand on the corner and shout out your opinion or go to the Mall in DC then you have that right because we live in a free country.  A lot of people in the world don’t get to do that, but we do.  It is just a matter of people getting off their butts and saying and doing things and voting.  That’s why we vote, so we can pick the people we want to go to Washington who will do what we want, not – for example – the unelected wife of our President.  Someday we may have a woman President and I’ll say for her husband what I say for the First Lady now – if you want to get involved in our government, run for office and get elected.  Don’t assume because your spouse was elected that it makes you special.”

Lemurita said “She sure ruined our pizza.”

She may be nine, but she’s been given a priceless lesson by the Obamas, which is rule of the people is far less palatable than rule by the people.

The kids take lunches to school now.  No way are we going to be a part of this ridiculous program.

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Fox News is getting stupider by the day, I swear.  They posted this pic with the caption:

Emmy Style: Hot or Not?

Seriously?  This is the equivalent to saying:

Ribs: Hot or Not?

I mean, great googley moogley… just LOOK at them.

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And here is a real live Public Safety Announcement from Lemur King (really really).

It was pointed out by my late mother-in-law, a chemist, that cooking the dish will not get rid of all the alcohol that you add to it for quite some time.  I was curious and damned if she wasn’t absolutely right.  So if you have a thing about exposure to ethanol in quantity, give it a think before you go tipping up a bottle of vino in your dish or flaming those pears with brandy.

 

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Smoked Meat is Great, If You Can Keep the Paper Lit… MoronBlogger Detroit

Smoking meat will give you a hell of a raspy cough though.

No Runny Eggs, Lemur King, Cruel Wife (and kidlets) plus a starving neighbor chowed down – smoked wings, pulled pork, ribs, rolls/buns, mustard and tomato sauces, mac and potato salad, baked beans…  Oh yeah.

NRE, being an incredibly laid back fella, seems to be a small-critter magnet, drawing attention from both of my offspring and Silver d’Cat.

This was a GOOD thing, as I had been cooking the pork butt (shoulder) roasts since 8pm the night before, and then the ribs since 9:30am this morning.   By the time you hit the home stretch, energetic offspring make it hard to pull it all together.  And I was *tired*.  Not at the peak of my game yet, obviously.

Meanwhile, Cruel Wife was awesomely terrific and made up a batch of my favorite Habanero Peanut-Butter Cookies.  Oh yeah.  I think NRE approved… (click the pics for larger versions)

Big Betsy – she finished off the buffalo wings, kept the pork warm, and toasted all the things that don’t do well in the smoker itself.

Here is Big Betsy.

The food… Note the bark on the ribs… black as sin but lots tastier (sez me).

I ended up scarfing 2-1/2 pulled pork sandwiches, four chunks of ribs, beans, mac salad, and enough Dr. Pepper to up my chances of diabetes by roughly 2000%.   I left my portion of buffalo wings to Cruel Wife since she is the one that would crawl bare-assed nekkid through turpentine and broken glass for a smoked wing – or rather – my smoked buffalo wings.

Girl-Child Unit #1 and Death-Wish Boy had a blast pestering NRE as I said before but I think they also managed to pull off “cute” at the same time, thus avoiding the humiliation of being sold to gypsies.  Their faces are covered for your protection, Constant Reader, for while they may look harmless, they are pure unadulterated evil.

Tomorrow the plan is to go to the Henry Ford Museum.  If you have never been there, this is a place worth making a vacation trip out of.  Between the Museum and Greenfield Village (both started by Ford) you have a lot of fascinating things to see, side by side.  Plan two days to see both.

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